Tag: Comedy

Just when you thought we were done with Halloween movies, I pull a fast one on you. Fun Size is a barely advertised kids movie about the wonders of Halloween. It deals with teen problems like choosing a college, losing a parent, having weird siblings, and just trying to get some.

Get some what? You know what.

Dorothy and a Cat. Basically the two easiest costumes for Halloween.

Wren (Victoria Justice) is a high school senior who lives in Ohio. Her dad passed away last year, and her family has never been the same. Her mom (Chelsea Handler) is looking for love in younger men, and her younger brother Albert (Jackson Nicoll) hasn’t spoken a word since the incident.

But hey, it’s Halloween, the dad’s favorite holiday, so everyone is going to be a bit weird. Wren wanted to go party with her best friend, April (Jane Levy) at a cute boys house. A musician!  Wren doesn’t care that much, she is kind of nerdy, but April in their drive to stay cool has convinced her that he is the one for her!

Her other nerd friends too nerdy. Roosevelt (Thomas Mann), who has lesbian mothers, and Peng (Osric Chau) because he is Asian. But Wren’s horrible mother black mails her into watching Albert on Halloween, because that is the only way she will sign her financial aid forms to NYU. Unfortunately for Wren, Albert is a clever little devil and escapes on Halloween night to have his own shenanigans.

So she is forced to look for him with the nerds and April, while also figuring out what she wants to do in her life. Albert befriends a convenience store clerk named Fuzzy (Thomas Middleditch), who can talk enough for the both of them while he plans revenge on the man who ruined his last relationship.

(I apologize for the shitty image) but I think this movie might make the one armed Spider-Man a “thing”.

Yes, strange as it may seem, this was not the worst movie I have ever seen. When I saw it in the theater, I was the only one there. The only other time that happened was with Madea’s Witness Protection and usually it is a bad omen. But it was a made for kids, Nickelodeon movie, so I understood the target audience.

Sure, parts of it made me fill with rage at how bad everything was going. Yet there were still scenes I found enjoyable/funny. The acting isn’t great at all, most of the friend characters are all stereotypes. They do feature some character growth, but in an obvious way. You know how all the relationships will work out well in advance, and offers nothing new. But yet, it is charming in a way. Sure, the Albert character started out as annoying, but he really was the main reason this film could be considered average. I enjoyed his shenanigans with Thomas Middleditch, and how Thomas Mann’s character grew some balls by the end.

There might be an issue of loose morals going on with the movie, after all, it is Nickelodeon and it involves sex! But hey, kids need to grow up sometime. I actually don’t know a single person who I could recommend this movie too, but it is fun seeing Jane Levy in a role that is the complete opposite of her character in Suburgatory. The problem is I think the boring parts outweighed the interesting ones, and even though it isn’t terrible, it still isn’t that good either.

The first time I heard about this movie was in the summer. I knew it was based off of an ad found in a paper at someplace in time. What did it say?

Wanted: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is not a joke. P.O. Box 322, Oakview, CA 93022. You’ll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guaranteed. I have only done this once before.

Nice! Turns out it was a joke made by the paper people to fill up some space, but it has built up enough interest that they made up a movie based on that exact plot line. Hooray for screen writers, I guess! Unless Safety Not Guaranteed is not a good movie, then boo screen writers, boo!

The best way to increase safety is to buy a reliable vehicle, with air bags and child locks.

Out in the heartland of Seattle, there exists a magazine. Which one? I don’t remember. But on the magazine, there are workers. Namely, Darius (Aubrey Plaza), a mid 20s girl who has no direction in her life, and just does whatever. But when a Jeff (Jake Johnson) gets the idea to find out the person who wrote the ad and do a story on them, he somehow gets it approved. He gets to bring along two interns, Darius and Arnau (Karan Soni), a biology student just wanting to diversify his resume.

But when they get to the area, they find him quite hard to find. Eventually though tactful spying, they find Kenneth (Mark Duplass), a grocery clerk with a big dream. But he doesn’t trust people. So Jeff fucks up at the start, and Kenneth won’t talk to him. It is up to Darius to pretend to be interested in going back in time (“pretend”) and get close enough to him for information.

But is the man a genius or just crazy? He claims government agents are after him, he wants to go back and prevent the death of a girlfriend, and he swears he has done it before. But no one knows if he is lying.

Plot twist: Romance chance.

With a budget of about 10 dollars, the first thing you might notice is that three of the four main characters are all from current TV shows, that’s nifty. None of which have ever been given a leading role in a movie before. Mark Duplass and Jake Johnson I see in movies, but always as minor characters. Aubrey Plaza has had some slightly better than minor roles in movies, her biggest probably being in Funny People.

I think it is incredible how much they did with really so little. They turned a joke newspaper ad into a story about finding yourself and learning to live. I didn’t think it was rolling on the floor hilarious or anything, but it was definitely enjoyable to watch.

I first saw the preview for Wreck-It Ralph when it premiered for the movie Brave. Unfortunately for Brave, I no longer cared about the Pixar movie I was about to watch, but instead was dreading the 4-5 month wait I’d have to endure before seeing Wreck-It Ralph. As a self described nerd, how could I not immediately think it would be the best thing ever.

Video games! In a movie! Ahh!

CAMEOS. OH GOD THE CAMEOS.

Our story takes place inside of an arcade, in the fictional game Fix-It Felix Jr., clearly a Donkey Kong-esque game. But the antagonist, Ralph (John C. Reilly) is tired of his place in life. He wrecks things like a boss, but he is tired of being the bad guy. The townsfolk and Felix (Jack McBrayer) are still afraid of him, unwilling to let him hang out during their downtime. However, they tell him if he is able to earn a medal on his own, they’d be willing to celebrate with him and treat him better.

You know, an impossible task given he is the bad guy in his game. So he decides to leave his game and temporarily join “Hero’s Duty”, a much newer and advanced FPS game that awards medals for reaching the top of the tower. Turns out games have gotten a lot more violent than they were 30 years ago and he has a few issues. He eventually is able to claim a medal but then finds himself himself in “Sugar Rush”, a candy land racer game, accidentally bringing an alien from the previous game. There he meets a glitch, Vanellope (Sarah Silverman) who is unable to enter the daily races due to the cruel King Candy (Alan Tudyk).

Alien breeding pools, lollipop fields, and Jane Lynch as a futuristic Captain await you in the finale of this game hopping film. But more importantly, can Ralph finish his task and get back to his game before his absence causes it to get unplugged for good?

Wouldn’t it be great if the tiny girls in Sugar Rush were all secretly Barakas?

Before I talk about how awesome this movie is, let me tell you my one real complaint. Sure, there are a lot of video game character cameos in the surge protectors outside of the games, but I am a bit disappointed Ralph only goes to visit two other games. I was expecting at least two more game hopping levels, to maximize the experience for Ralph. They might have done this only to to increase material for future movies (that really aren’t necessary).

But the rest of the movie, wow oh wow. The animators put a lot of effort into the detail of the worlds. There is a lot that goes on in the background, including additional cameos. Despite the large advertisements with Sonic upfront, he is only in a “commercial” in the actual movie. Personally, I thought Zangief was the best cameo in the movie, given that his character felt a bit inspirational with his back story.

I am having a hard time to figuring out if I liked the movie for being good, or just because I grew up with video games. Obviously if you have never really been a fan of video games, I don’t think this is the best movie to watch. But I still think it is an enjoyable enough comedy/action movie that will entertain everyone who sees it, even if they don’t understand every little reference.

Happy November 6th, 2012! It is Election Day in America, so I went the obvious route and picked The Campaign to review. I don’t even have a clever intro to say before I talk about the movie, so fuck it, lets just go into it.

Just gotta warm my tongue muscles first.

In the 14th District of North Carolina, life is simple. Cam Brady (Will Ferrell) is running for his fifth term as congressman for the Democratic party and is unopposed. I guess people really like him. Sure he is a filthy man, and doesn’t do much, but who cares. Unfortunately, his popularity takes a drastic turn down when he leaves a very explicit sexual message for a woman he is cheating on his wife (Katherine LaNasa) with. His campaign manager (Jason Sudeikis) tries to put a positive spin on it all, but nothing really seems to work.

This spells for trouble in Capitol Hill, namely with the Motch brothers (John Lithgow, Dan Aykroyd) who are working on a new plan with China and need all the support they can get. Seems like now is the best time to replace Brady with someone new, that the public will love. Unfortunately their only available contact in the area is Marty Huggins (Zach Galifiankis), the son no one talks about. Wanting to make his dad proud, he is happy to run and make his area of North Carolina better.

He just didn’t know it involved changing everything about himself, his wife (Sarah Baker) and kids, from the mysterious campaign manager Tim Wattley (Dylan McDermott).

But more importantly, once both men are in the race, how low will they go to discredit the other, just for a chance to help start Project: Insourcing?

Will they be able to stop all this family shit and man up?

Having lived in North Carolina, I was happy to notice a lot more subtle jokes than one would have expected. Like the 14th District of North Carolina, that doesn’t even exist! NC had 13 districts, not sure if they did that for legal reasons, or for the joke, but I will so go for the joke.

Cutting right to the chase, this movie did make me laugh. I giggled quite often. But I think the movie went the easy route with most of the jokes, and could have made a stronger movie overall, tackling bigger issues, while also keeping a lot of the jokes. The DVD for this movie came out about a week ago, all of the timing makes since. They wanted this movie because of the presidential election. Yet they didn’t really say anything important about it.

Sure, the basic message of money buying elections is probably true. Minor jokes on the Romney/Obama campaigns, and other parallels like John Edwards. But overall it just seemed to be missing a lot more.

I would suggest seeing the movie once, it will probably make you laugh. I just don’t think it will pack as big of a punch in multiple viewings.

It has been a few years since we have had a stop motion scary movie, the last of which was three years ago in Coraline. But this year we have two! ParaNorman, made by some relatively unheard of directors, and Frankenweenie, a remake of a 1984 short film by Tim Burton, king of the slightly creepy.

Yep, ParaNorman is the underdog in this fight but hey, it is at least in color!

All white people, but color nonetheless.

Norman (Kodi Smit-McPhee) can see dead people. Ghosts at least, who are stuck on earth because their time and tasks have not been completed and cannot move on. So you’d think Norman would go around helping all the ghosts move on, but instead he just befriends them and acts like its not his problem. That isn’t the movie plot, they never even bring up Norman helping the ghosts, he is just a dick kid who never thinks to help out his ghost friends. Just an observation!

He doesn’t keep the ghosts a secret either, so everyone thinks he is a freak. His parents don’t know what to do (Jeff Garlin, Leslie Mann) and his sister (Anna Kendrick) thinks he is a loser. Outside of the ghosts, so far just a normal sounding life. His only friend is a guy named Neil (Tucker Albrizzi), who has no friends because he is fat. True story.

In this town, their claim to fame is that they once burned a witch. But before the witch was burnt, she hexxed her seven accusers into a zombie fate once they die, meaning that  she is actually a witch and really they did nothing wrong. You can’t just let witches free and running amuck! Years later, the curse still has not occurred because of people like crazy uncle Penderghast (John Goodman) who delay the curse. But once he kicks the bucket, it is up to Norman to make sure the zombies don’t rise up and take over, with the help of Neil, Neil’s older brother (Casey Affleck), his sister, and the local bully (Christopher Mintz-Plasse).

SO MANY ZOMBIES. SEVEN OF THEM. AHH.

Personally, I found the movie to be a bit boring. It is hard to classify just what kind of movie this was, and for who it was meant to be enjoyed by. Most of the good jokes were given away in the trailer and I didn’t understand how this town even felt threatened. I mean, seven zombies? That is a very specific finite number of zombies, in the modern age, a town should be able to handle them. There is a scene where the towns people try to destroy them and end up killing exactly zero. Despite multiple guns, they actually just end up beating them up with umbrellas and clubs and let them get away. Well then.

I could talk a lot about the actual movie, but this one has controversy which is more exciting.

Controversy? In a kids movie? Yes! At the end of the movie, one of the main characters turns out to be gay. It was just meant to be a minor joke, but it has caused a lot of parents to freak out. I won’t get into how ridiculous this controversy even is, leaving that up to you.

Overall, I can’t see why this film has received such high praise. I just felt the stop motion wasn’t the best and that most of the jokes fell flat. Feel free to see it as soon as you can and prove me wrong or tell me what I missed, because I am willing to listen. I do understand that the moral of the film wasn’t just destroy the witch/zombies, but that wasn’t enough for me to care.

Entirely my fault, but as soon as I started to watch this movie, I was immediately disappointed.

I saw L!fe Happens in the RedBox, and was like, “HOLY SHIT THE GOOCH IS STARRING IN A MOVIE GO GO GO GO GOGOGOGOGOGOGO!”

Well it’s not The Gooch. It is just Krysten Ritter, who always reminds me of The Gooch. Except for when I started to watch Don’t Trust the Bitch in Apartment 23. I started that show because I thought it was Christina Ricci.

Basically, I have no idea who this fucking woman is.

The story begins with Deena (Kate Bosworth) and Kim (Ritter) really wanting to have sex. They are roomies, you see, and actually both brought a guy home! But they can’t find any damn condoms. Well, one, and Deena claims it. A year later, Kim has a child. Max, aww.

They also have a third roommate, Laura (Rachel Bilson) but she is a virgin and that’s all she brings to the table in the movie. I guess as a sort of opposite to the main two?

Anyways, the baby daddy (Rhys Coiro) doesn’t want to be a dad, so she is basically on her own. She pushes her baby on other people, like her dad, and roommates, because she still feels the need to party and feels like she deserves it. She also ends up falling for some Nicholas dude (Geoff Stults) and tells him the baby belongs to her roommate. That’s a good start to a relationship.

So now she is all lying it up, and constantly trying to make her friends help her out. They don’t like that, or the lies. Hey, Jason Biggs and Justin Kirk are also in this. Hooray~.

Um. Uhhh. Just hanging out ladies? That’s cool. Stop staring at me.

Turns out there is not much to say about this film. It was just terrible. Characters aren’t really likable, story is boring, there aren’t really any funny moments. It literally has nothing going on for it. So little that I can’t even make a good joke about it.

I mean. Fuck. Why would you do this to me, movie people? Such a boring lame movie? I trusted you, and you just poked me in the eye. Twice. The same eye. I mean, it is nice of them to not do one poke per eye, or else I’d be blind, but the second poke on an already poked eye is basically pointless.

Nevermind, if an eye poke was pointless, it probably wouldn’t actually be a poke, would it?

So I started using Redbox. Why is that important? Because that is why I saw Hysteria. Despite having all my movies for last week, it kept giving me free rentals, the jerks. So hopefully I remember enough about this movie even though it was over 10 days ago when I saw it. But given the subject matter, I can tell you it will be awhile before I forget the main details.

Because there are some visuals you just can never forget.

Back at the end of the 19th century, there was an epidemic in the world, especially in Great Britain. Women were hysterical. In fact, it was called Hysteria. Easy name. Women were speaking their mind, having opinions, demanding shit. What in the fuck.

Well, enter Mortimer Granville (Hugh Darcy). He is a doctor, and he reads journals. Too bad other doctors don’t give a shit. Hell, they cant even believe he washes his hands all the time. Well he lashes out at his boss one day and loses his job. Its like an apprenticeship type thing, and he is fucked. No one is hiring. No one but Dr. Robert Dalrymple (Jonathan Pryce) who everyone thinks is a cook anyways.

You see, he is a doctor who specializes in women. Most notably curing their hysteria. How does he do that? Well, massaging their genitals basically. Woo, masturbation!

But he gets requested so much, his hand starts to tire. First world problems and such. Once his friend shows him an invention of an electric duster, he decides to modify it and test it for science on his patients. You know, inventing basically the vibrator.

Also featuring the two daughters of Dalrymple, one a nice obedient assistant (Felicity Jones), the other a feminist who tries to start a school for girls (Maggie Gyllenhaal).

Man, I totally wrote “massaging their genitals” earlier and it was on topic.

Movie about the invention of the vibrator? Of course I am game. I saw a preview for this once, awhile ago, but somehow forgot to actually go and check it out immediately. This came out around the same time as a play, In The NextRoom (or The Vibrator Play) which is actually about the same topic. But starts off after the invention and its antics, not a lot of lead up like this one with some extra love story.

I know I am not mad that there are two mediums addressing the same topic. Hell, I just want to see the play now. I am sure it is a riot.

Unfortunately for this movie, a period piece comedy, there isn’t too many laughs. It is just more a happy story type of comedy, with the obvious orgasm jokes that occur. Silly past people, how little did you know.

Definitely an interesting movie that you should probably watch with your parents.

When I first heard about the film Seven Psychopaths, I was definitely excited. This movie is directed by Martin McDonagh, the guy who brought us In Bruges four years ago.

If you haven’t seen In Bruges, you definitely should. It is a dark comedy, and a pretty unique movie experience. But no pressure on McDonagh to recreate the magic of his last movie or anything.

Pictured above: Unique experience.

Marty (Colin Farrell) is a struggling screen writer and now alcoholic. He had some success, but he cant find the motivation for his next film, which is way past its deadline! Plus, his girlfriend is a bitch, maybe. His best friend, Billy (Sam Rockwell), an out of work actor really wants to help him on his new movie called Seven Psychopaths, so he puts an ad in the local paper calling all psychopaths to contact Marty and tell him their story. Ah jeez, thanks.

At the same time, Billy is working with an old friend of his, Hans (Christopher Walken) on a small time dog kidnapping business. Kidnap dogs from rich looking people, wait for them to post a reward, and boom, profit! Hans is working on money to pay for his wife’s cancer treatment (Linda Bright Clay). Unfortunately, they end up kidnapping the wrong man’s dog. Charlie (Woody Harrelson), a high ranking member of the local Italian mob loves his dog more than anything, and will kill anyone in his way to get him back!

Right. While all of that is going on, Marty is getting caught up in these shenanigans while also hearing stories from other psychopaths, such as Zachariah (Tom Waits), a Dexter sort of psychopath, and a pretty pissed off former member of the Vietcong(Long Nguyen). Not only does Marty have to survive the full wrath of the local mob, thanks to his friends attempts to help inspire the screenplay any way possible, but also stop drinking so gosh darn much!

You know where alcohol gets you? In the hospital. That’s the real moral of this whole movie.

If I am going to compare here, I can say that Seven Psychopaths is a bit more crazier than In Bruges, and you’d expect that with a film that had psychopath in the title. Unfortunately for myself, I had the displeasure of sitting behind a woman who cackled at every small amusing thing, ruining a bit of the humor for myself, but I still found it pretty damn funny. This film had large amounts of normal comedy and “dark comedy”, easily willing to make both groups happy (and potentially uncomfortable if you just want comedy). Basically, if you hate death, stay away.

But the person who really made this movie I think was Sam Rockwell, out of all the actors. His character just felt leagues above the rest of the cast, not that they were bad, just no where as near as awesome and crazy as his. He forces you to watch him every time he is on screen.

I think the only thing I didn’t really enjoy was the “movie in a movie” aspect of it. The movie, Seven Psychopaths, is about a guy trying to write a movie called Psychopaths, and very strange movie like circumstances occurring to his life as a result. Don’t get me wrong, the things that occurred were pretty fantastic, I just almost wanted a 100% real movie instead for a higher shenanigan potential. Definitely a great movie to watch with the friends however, with a fun time guaranteed.

Regardless of how good or bad the movie Here Comes The Boom ends up being, I think we all should give Kevin James some serious credit. He lost over 80 lbs for this movie, trained with MMA fighters (already being a big fan), and actually grew the muscle you see in the film.

You see that? That is perseverance if anything.

Scott Voss (James) is a down and out high school biology teacher. He gives zero fucks right now about his life, and is late quite often to teaching his own class. How does he teach? He lays back and lets them do book work, very little interaction. Ten years ago he was teacher of the year! He used to care then! But with budget cuts and changes in policy, he has lost all will to care. But you know who does care? Marty Streb (Henry Winkler), the music teacher. Not only that, but at his old age he has a kid on the way! So much passion, so little time. However, the school budget is being cut, and his job is gone after next year.

Well, Scott can’t accept that. He loves the orchaestra music he hears. They need to raise the money! But with out any other teachers willing to help, except for the school nurse (Salma Hayek). After teaching a few nigh time citizenship classes for extra funds, Scott agrees to tutor Niko (Bas Rutten), a large man from Holland who introduces him to UFC and other MMA events. What’s that? Even the loser makes cash? Well, shit! Scott used to wrestle in college, twenty years ago, he can just do that to earn money much faster!

Here Comes The Boom is one man’s quest to lose (and hey, maybe sometimes win) to save his new friends job at a high school that just doesn’t seem to care anymore. Also featuring Joe Rogan as himself, and Charice as a school girl in his class, who you might recognize as Sunshine for a few episodes on Glee.

Oh there is no way he doesn’t make it to the big times with this all star talent in his corner.

I know this may come as a shock, but the song Boom – P.O.D. is actually featured quite heavily in this movie. Who’d have thought?!

As expected, this film doesn’t offer much in terms of unique never before seen moments of film. It has its Rocky moments, but its hard to do a fighting movie without them. It even reminds me a bit of Warrior, one of the better/underrated films of 2011, as one of the main characters was a teacher who was trying to raise money through MMA fighting. That one being a lot more realistic, having him lose his job once the school found out about his second life and all.

But hey, this is a family movie with a happy ending. The drama that happens is expected, as is the conclusion to the story. I wouldn’t describe this as Kevin James’ worst movie, but it isn’t his best either. Henry Winkler brought a lot of heart to the movie though, and Bas Rutten had enough energy to be exciting as well. Basically, without reading a review, most of you could guess on how the movie would turn out, a pretty average film.

Damsel in Distress? That is a pretty popular phrase. Probably considered a bit sexist now, since theres never a dame in distress, I guess.

Honestly, the main reason I watched this movie was because the cover was nice and pretty. I am sure the indie film will take all the support it can get, regardless of reasons.

Hey I know…one of these people.

At some University, a prestigious one at that, there is a problem. Girls sometimes get depressed and kill themselves. Whether from break up or the large amounts of pressure placed on them, it apparently sucks more to be a woman. This happened enough that a group of girls took it on themselves to create a campus Suicide Watch Hotline. Lead by Violet (Greta Gerwin) and helped by her two eager friends, Heather (Carrie MacLemore) and Rose (Megalyn Echikunwoke).

What they tend to do is take a troubled person and introduce them to tap dancing, giving them an outlet to focus their energy and time on and gain a unique skill. And donuts. Interesting approach indeed. A transfer student, Lily (Analeigh Tipton) is invited to join their group and become what they feel are the social elite in their mannerisms, but in reality most people don’t like them because they are rude and pompous.

The story of the movie is basically a year in their lives of college, their dealings with tap dancing and the local news papers manager (Zach Woods), their relationships with men (Ryan Metcaf, Hugo Becker, Adam Brody), and their own potential fall into depression.

That’s right. Just a simple tappa-tappa-tappa can heal all your woes!

Oh hey look, its Greta Gerwig, who I think I have in at least three reviews by now. She keeps popping up in these either indie or weird movies, must be what she likes (or is all she can get, one or the other). I can say I have liked her the most in this compared to her previous roles. She takes full command of this character and you will always go straight to her, possibly just because of the intense melodramaticness of it all.

But who cares if one actress did better than her other roles you probably didn’t see her in? Hows the dang movie? Well the movie? It is weird, just not the same weird that I normally put to movies I like. I have a theory. Aliens. That must be it. I just don’t know how a group can consider themselves so elite, and do such elite things, while being as hypocritical as they end up being. It is just so odd to watch, and figure out what the heck is the point of the movie.

But with that, I give you an average review. I mean, I don’t think it was bad. It might have been good? But I might have to see it again. In like a year, yeah, then I can go back to it and remember nothing and try it again. Because right now I kind of have no idea really what the heck it was all about.