Tag: 3 out of 4

Definitely a movie that I only heard about once before, and just kind of said “eh, fuck it! Lets watch.”

Can’t say I expected much out of 4.3.2.1. Just knew it was some sort of drama/action movie, involving maybe a heist and four different girls with their own storyline.

Which, I guess, is a lot to know about it. Also a British movie. But overall, expected something average and found it to be pretty good.

Look at how unique and different they are!

Beginning scene quickly introduces us to the main characters. When they walk away from the diner, it breaks into each character separately, telling their story for the next three days (Friday-Sunday), until they meet up all again.

First, Shannon (Ophelia Lovibond) goes hoem to find her parents getting divorced. Or at least her mom is leaving them. It was all in a note, but one of her friends accidentally got it. Over her weekend she has a depressing time, no one to hang out with, and gets attacked by muggers in the street over some diamonds she supposedly has. Thinking her friends no longer like her, and other problems, she wants to commit suicide.

Cassandra (Tamsin Egerton) is going to NYC to meet her internet boyfriend. This also has a Kevin Smith cameo on the plane, out of no where and awesome. Turns out her internet boyfriend isn’t real, but a prank. Well she doesn’t like that.

Kerrys (Shanika Warren-Markland) is a lesbian! And doesn’t give shit about nobody. She watches Cassandra’s place for the weekend, is the bitch of the group, and has far too many people piss her off this weekend.

Jo (Emma Roberts) is an American, and is from a well off family. But with her father injured from work, she has to work some night shifts at a local convenience store. A manager she never seen before is up to shady things with the safe, and also other possible crimes.

I have been watching a lot of movies with Emma Roberts recently. Go figure.

Felt weird talking about the plot outline, without wanting to give them away. But how was the experience?

The first storyline I was kind of confused at what was going on. The other girls appear in each storyline, whether in person, or phone call or text, but obviously you know the least about whats going on with just the first storyline. As the story goes on, more and more holes are filled in and you know more about the characters. Get to experience the actions as each member, instead of omnipresent movie watcher.

So overall I would say it started off slow and weird, but definitely got better. Also, “Strangely enough”, each woman character after the first was pretty strong of a character. They all had to do “something” action-y, some more than others. Whether it was tying up and kicking the ass of online predators, chasing people out of a house with a sword, or beating up people at a bar.

Not only that, but the action was generally real enough. And the drama.

Ending was a bit of a let down with all the build up, but most of the stuff I just really enjoyed. Surprisingly.

I can say that I honestly only watched Lymelife because I saw Alec Baldwin on the cover. Of course he was wearing a suit too.

Because that is all Alec Baldwin has to do nowadays.

Well its a suit of clothing at least, right?

This movie is more about a little rich~ kid named Scott (Rory Culkin). They used to live in Queens, but have moved out to Long Island, and are kind of big on real estate. Also this is the 70s.

Apparently Lyme disease may have just started recently, or it doesn’t have a real cure or something. Can mess you up for years. One of their neighbors (Timothy Hutton) got a deer tick while hunting two years ago, and has never been the same. Kind of sick a lot. His wife (Cynthia Nixon) has to bring home the bacon on her own, and makes it all kind of weird on their daughter (Emma Roberts).

Scott kind of has a thing for her too, but she is way more popular than him. Speaking of having a thing for people, Scott’s dad (Baldwin) is having an affair with her mom. Yay! The mom doesn’t enjoy being married to a sick guy. Scott’s mom (Jill Hennessy) knows something is up, but she just seems crazy to Scott. It isn’t until Scott’s brother returns temporarily from the army (Kieran Culkin. Yes real life younger brothers to Macaulay) for her birthday does Scott realize the truth about his father.

This causes a lot of family strife amongst both groups. Even more bad things happen when they find out Mr. “I am diseased” father hasn’t been going to his job interviews, mostly enjoying the whole “stay at home and do nothing aspect” of his life. Doesn’t mean he takes kindly to cheating. Factoring in all of the parents issues makes Scotts little crush seem insignificant. Doesn’t mean he was going to stop crushing, just puts it in perspective for him.

The end of the movie is full of betrayal, families rekindling and others splitting, new love, and maybe a gunshot or two.

See them bundled? It’s because they don’t want ticks. And its cold. And they might have just had sex.

I should have told the plot in a more straightforward way. My bad. But this movie was pretty intense.

The last five minutes I was scared. A lot of comparisons are made in regards to this movie and American Beauty, but they are pretty different. I guess they kind of both talk about the American Dream and sex with a neighbor (kind of neighbor). But one is a mid life crisis, and the other is a teenage boy. Who’s dad may be going through a midlife crisis. Either way, affairs are bad, and having people with guns mad at you is bad. So in those last five minutes when I was scared, it still wasn’t that predictable.

And most importantly, I wasn’t left without an answer. The plot lines were all finished. I wouldn’t say in a nice neat little package, because of some of the implications afterwards, but definitely felt like a full movie which was good.

I thought a lot of the acting was great, especially from Hutton, Baldwin, and Nixon. Rory would later want to bang Emma in Scream 4, because all of those people are in the same movies for some reason.

Haha! Funny People! A movie about people who are funny!

That is the assumption at least. I will let you know I’ve heard tons of bad things about this movie. Most of my friends hated it. But damn it, I loved 50/50 (which could just be the better version of this movie, not sure). I also thought It’s Kind Of A Funny Story was supposed to be similar to those two (it isn’t) but I loved it as well. So damn it, I am going to watch Funny People and see what the hell happens.

Although this is a scene from the movie, it is definitely way out of context.

Alright lets get the basics.

Seth Rogen wants to be a stand up comic, but isn’t good at it. He has some good material, but bad delivery. Also maybe too many fart jokes. He lives with Jonah Hill, who is more successful and improv like, and Jason Schwartzman, who is staring in some kids sitcom about a cool teacher. Making those ‘big’ bucks.

Adam Sandler plays a big celebrity star. He has done a lot of shitty movies, and used to just be a stand up comic guy too. Turns out he is probably going to die, to a rare disease, kind of shattering his world view. I mean, fuck. He didn’t see that coming. He doesn’t even have really any friends. Needless to say he is kind of depressed, and bombs at a comedy club, where Seth Rogen is quick to make fun of him for his act for cheap laughs.

Sandler freaking out hires Seth to write some jokes for him, and also pseudo take him under his wing for a little bit. Opportunity of a life time for him, at the end of Sandlers. He also is one of the first to know, and helps him out during it when he gets sick. Sandler slept around a lot, so he regrets having that one “slip away”, in Leslie Mann, who is now married to an Australian journalist, Eric Bana, with two kids. Rogen’s problems are just his inability to talk to women, and having a three month plan to try and score with Aubrey Plaza, a neighbor of his.

This movie does NOT end with Sandler’s death. Because the movie is more so about the trial he is on working, and having a new shot a life, after he had thought it was over. Can he fix the wrongs in his life, and get out of his celebrity funk?

Har har har! Funny people!

I think one of the biggest complaints about this movie is the length. Almost 2.5 hours long, it is very unexpected for a movie of its type. The unrated version is about 10 minutes longer (and I can’t tell which I watched. I wanted the Unrated one, but the Blu-Ray menu was confusing!). Apparently it only adds more stand up parts, which I found amusing.

Maybe another complaint is in terms of direction. I really thought it was going to end with Sandler dying. I read the back of the box afterward, and it pretty much begins with “a man getting his second shot at life”. Oh yeah, definitely made that clear with words, just not the previews. So only half of it was him dying, the second half being alive and figuring out what to do now.

Definitely an interesting way to take it, and something I didn’t see happening. I thought the movie felt very real, and I enjoyed it though. It could have definitely been better overall, and not as unforgettable as other Apatow movies. I am sure I will watch it again, just farther in the future, as it is a pretty long time commitment, but I thought it did a good job overall.

Again, a movie with a thousand tags. But I will explain it very simply for you so that is all makes sense. The plot of Away We Go it turns out is pretty damn simple to understand. More time for analysis (if I choose). Hooray!

It’s about love. And finding your love’s vagina.

John Krasinski and Maya Rudolph are an unmarried couple, but guess what, they are having a baby. She doesn’t want to get married, but still truly believes they will be together forever. They had moved to be closer to John’s parents (Jeff Daniels and Catherine O’Hara) to have some sort of relative in the babies life, since her parents are dead.

But when she is 6 months in, they find out they are moving to Belgium. For two years. Making their living arrangements kind of pointless. Afraid that their lives are fucked up and bad, they agree to go on a mini vacation to different parts of the country to visit their other family memmbers and friends, to see if they would be good places to live.

First to Arizona, to see Maya’s old boss and her husband / family (Allison Janney and Jim Gaffigan) who seem to be drunk a lot, and not too happy with life, and her sister. Then to Madison, for a job interview, where they also meet John’s cousin and husband (Maggie Gyllenhaal and Josh Hamilton), who are way too extreme on the hippy side.

Then to Montreal, to visit their mutual friends (Melanie Lynskey and Chris Messina), who have adopted many children, due to the unfortunate nature of Melanie’s ability to have a child (multiple miscarriages). Finally, a trip to Miami, to visit John’s brother (Paul Schneider) and help him out of a bad situation.

The whole time they are traveling they are dealing with their own problems, and wondering about their own inadequacies. And by both of them, I mean Maya. Because John is way too swell of a person, and optimistic, he is constantly making things better, all while looking like a hipster.

Exhibit A.

Their final destination choice I will let remain a mystery. Because fuck you, that’s why.

I thought the movie was pretty enjoyable. I laughed a lot more than I expected, thinking it would be a lot more heavily drama-nated. But man, there was many great scenes, and it all felt incredibly real. Hopefully their love in this fictional universe of the movie carries on after the birth and throughout their whole life. You are given a nice feeling that they have found true peace and happiness with their decisions, and everything will work out for the best.

Also, a lot of vagina talk.

I didn’t mean to watch this movie today, but when I was halfway to work I realized I didn’t bring any of the three I had meant to watch. So I had a quick “Oh no! Boredom!” moment, but thankfully I do have access to someone’s netflix. I went randomly through my list of movies I own that I didn’t watch and Flakes was on instant stream.

Problem solved. But if I was cooler, I’d have found a movie I don’t own and haven’t seen. My bad!

But as it stands, my ability to slack is over my ability to be efficient.

Speaking of slackers, this is another movie about a slacker. I feel like that’s all I watch now. Neal (Aaron Stanford) is going no where with life. He has a hot girlfriend in Zooey Deschanel though. But he is the manager and main worker at a store called Flakes, which is like a bar, but instead of alcohol they server cereal, all day every day. Such a wide selection too, and some rare cereals. Can add fruit if you want, and change up the milk kind. Pretty rad idea. But not the biggest money maker.

But when some suit (Keir O’Donnell) opens up a shop next door, with a similar name and same concept, just MORE, it could mean trouble. Especially since thanks to fights and not hiring Zooey, she goes to work with the new store. After all, if she can shut down the origial Flakes, her boyfriend can finally stop wasting all his time, and finish his damn album.

The movie is basically the battle of the cereal shops, in New Orleans. Christopher Lloyd plays the seemingly crazy owner of the business, and Frank Wood a very dedicated customer who also can find hard to find / discontinued cereals.

MOAR CEREAL

For whatever reason, I found this movie quite enjoyable. Not the most compelling tale at all, something probably done many times before, and even a bit too slow paced, but I thought it all worked given the circumstances. My plotline sets it up for a different type of movie. Sure they battle at the beginning. Business tactics, but mostly apathy and assume their side will win. Well the wrong side wins about halfway through the movie, leaving our “heroes” jobless from their own pseudo-creation.

So we get to see them try other jobs and going to their conquerors, and seeing if a lack of Flakes really changes their outlook at all.

Sometimes you need a story that has a happy ending, even if it comes through unconventional ways.

I saw a preview for Charlie Bartlett years ago and wasn’t really sure what to think of it. Like most previews, I didn’t actively chase after it and soon forgot about it. Years later, I see the cover and go…OH YEAH. Surprised at the actors involved too, since this thing came out in 2007, at least a year before most of these people got big (or got big..again).

I think we all know who I am talking about here.

Charlie Bartlett is played by Anton Yelchin, who didn’t make it super big yet with Star Trek / The Beaver / Fright Night. He is a rich kid, but his mom is depressed and his dad is in jail for tax evasion. He also keeps getting kicked out of private schools for some reason or another.

But now, he is going to public school. Not only that, but going to a school where Robert Downey Jr. is the principal (Not yet re-famous from Tropic Thunder / Iron Man / Sherlock Holmes ). He has problems making friends, except for one mentally challenged boy he rides the bus with. In fact the school bully Murphy (Tyler Hilton who was in…uhh nothing. Okay he isn’t too big…yet?) already kicked his ass.

But once Charlie realizes he could probably make money and some cash by selling people his extra pills that his psychiatrist has given him, he convinces Murph to team up with him and set up shop in the Boys bathroom. He becomes a psychiatrist himself. Afterall, he has been to enough his whole life, so he feels like he knows what should be said. If they need help, he goes to a new psychiatrist and takes on their problems to get different pill subscriptions. Needless to say, this makes him quite popular. So much that Susan (Kat Dennings, not yet in Thor / Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist / 2 Broke Girls ), the rebellious principals daughter, gets to liking him too.

But a drug ring in this school, that already has sketch privacy issues in the first place, and dating Susan? RBJ does not like this, and plans to expel Charlie once he catches him doing…something bad.

While the whole time, Charlie is only doing this stuff to try and fit in and make friends, not planning on becoming an activist leader for student rights, or rocking the boat too much. After all, he is just a kid.

Who will listen to your problems like a Priest. Kind of.

Turns out I should have watched this film earlier, because it was a very enjoyable experience. The plot felt loose the whole movie, yet it flowed naturally. The acting from the main two was top notch, and touching at times. I wasn’t ever sure if Charlie was being very manipulative, or actually unaware of the effects he was having on the lives of others. One of the final scenes, between Yelchin and RDJ was very powerful and awesome at the same time. Didn’t even rely on special effects or action, just the talking felt completely real, making it great.

The movie was definitely funny when it needed to be and serious when it mattered the most. Parts felt forced, sure, which caused some of my “is he manipulative or not?” confusion, but really at the end, he was just a kid who wanted to fit in for once.

21 Jump Street (the movie) is nothing like 21 Jump Street (the TV show). Have I seen the show? No. But I know “about it” enough so that I get it. That was more of a crime drama thing, not really a comedy. The movie is a straight up comedy, with tons of references to the show.

You can like both the show and the movie, because it is clearly not a “Remake” but its own thing, taking the basic premise of the show. You know, in case you were curious. But I should also note that when I first heard about it my reaction was a resounding “What The Fuck!?”

But are these two knuckleheads at all believable in these roles or as cops?

Movie begins in 2005, when Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum‘s characters were in school. Hill, nerdy and shy. Tatum, athlete and dumb. 7 years later, some how, they are both wanting to be cops. They remember each other, and agree to work together (helping study / train) and become great friends and partners!

And after a bad first arrest while being park patrol on bikes, they get re-sentenced to an undercover gig on Jump Street, because they are “young looking” to infiltrate a high school and try and stop this new drug from being spread. Could be lethal, but they know nothing about it! So they have to infiltrate the dealers, find the suppliers. So says Ice Cube, their sergeant.

They meet the “cool kids” Brie Larson and Dave Franco, and accidentally switch their identities. ROLE ROLE REVERSAL. They find the dealers, and work on befriending them in order to find the supplier, and you know. Hopefully save the day without getting fired or expelled.

This also features Rob Riggle as a PE teacher, Ellie Kemper as an AP Chemistry teacher, Jake M. Johnson as the principal, and Nick Offerman as their former boss. (This was my paragraph of “People you probably recognize from a TV show”).

Yes, that is the younger brother of James Franco. And it would have bugged you the whole movie noting how similar they looked. He is formally known as “Greg the soccer player” in Superbad.

But outside of all of it, was it funny? Yeah, shit was funny.

It was a self aware comedy too, making obvious jabs at the idea of recreating an 80s drama show into a modern comedy movie. Very easy to catch jokes too. Not everything has to be very subtle.

The made up drug is great, and the moment when the characters were forced to use it? Some of the most funniest consecutive minutes of my life.

Ever joke I don’t think hit the mark, but a large percentage of them did. The action scenes they threw in got to be quite heavy (and slightly predictable) and at one point they actually made a claim that goes against the teachings of South Park, a very hard pill to swallow.

Catfish is a “documentary” on, well, the internet.

Ready for my vaguest plot summary ever?

This is Megan!

This is a “documentary” about Abby. Abby is an 8 year old girl who paints pictures, and mails them off to a guy named ‘Nev‘ in New York City, because she saw him in the paper and thought he was cute. Nev lives with two filmmakers, and because of his relationship with this wunderkind artist, they want to make a film! Begins with them getting more artwork, and it kicking ass. He even befriends Abby’s family!

First her mom, Angela, and then her older sister, Megan about 19. Facebook is great. Turns out Megan is great too. Has a lot in common with Nev, writers he own music, has her own social life. They don’t start dating, but they are interested in each other. He also gets to know her friends, her moms friends, whatever.

But one day he finds out that a song she sent him as a cover, sounds identical to a different cover found on the internet.

Roadtrip!

Yes, that is all of the plot outline you will get out of me. A lot of the point about the movie is the discovery, and journey, so even letting you know more already ruins it. Obviously I used quotation marks around documentary a lot.

Is this a real story? Maybe. Probably not. It at least has real people in it. They aren’t saying its fake. Technically the events that occurred all seem to have happened, but maybe parts were exaggerated or recreated for the purpose of a movie.

Finally, it is kind of a different movie genre. It seems to be a bit experimental, and I think it pays off. There could be a theme of fakeness in this movie, given the topic at hand, and the questionability in the film itself. If so, well done. Layers and shit.

But yeah, I liked it, even though it slowed at points near the end. If it is real, I like the level of respectability that went into it. If not well, its a pretty good fake documentary.

know why Jennifer’s Body sucked? I mean, it was written by the same person who did Juno (and Young Adult)! But these two movies were also directed by Jason Reitman, who passed on Jennifer’s Body, and also directed things like Up In The Air and Thank You For Smoking.

Director beats Writer. I think Science just proved that?

It’s the Hello Kitty shirt that should really speak to you here.

Charlize Theron is a very successful writer in NYC! And by very successful, I mean she has written books as part of a series, but didn’t create the series. Although he name is on the inside flap as the author, the series creator still gets front cover status. It is found in the “Young Adult” section of a book store. Oh well, still cool. Especially since she is a girl from a small town in Minnesota, where most people just stay put and live there their whole lives. Yeah!

But now she is getting depressed (and may have been an alcoholic for some time). She just broke up with her long term manfriend, and her high school boyfriend is now married just had his first kid. And the series is ending, so she has to write the final book, and then figure out what else to do with her life. Seems like a good time to visit her home town! Oh, and plot to win her old love back. Who cares if he is married and has child?

First she meets Matt (Patton Oswalt), a kid who she barely knew in high school, who was taken to the woods and had his legs and dick beaten by jocks with crowbars, for being gay. But once they found out he wasn’t gay, it was no longer called a hate crime and they barely got into trouble. He says her plan is stupid. But she tries anyways to recreate how she looked in high school, and how they would do young people things, like getting drunk at a bar! But Buddy (Patrick Wilson) doesn’t want to.

But she keeps trying. Even going out to to the naming ceremony for the son. Yes, she does it all in front of his wife (Elizabeth Reaser). Even goes to the wives local garage band concert. Questionable motives indeed.

But can she succeed and win over her former lover? Or will the whole town think she is crazy?

Life is simpler in Minnesota. Phones with cords.

So, the dark comedy part of this tag means pretty dark. Minus the death elements in a lot of dark comedies, but man. This humor is based off of extreme awkwardness, meanness, and past situations you didn’t see coming. Also the uncomfortableness of the main character being a depressed drunk, who does seemingly crazy actions.

I wasn’t surprised by what happened at the end, it made sense, but I was surprised at the way it happened. Which was the totally uncomfortable way. (Word of the the day, uncomfortable).

I thought Charlize Theron (an actress I normally don’t care for) did a great job in her crisis, and truly believing all of the crazy things that she did. Thought it was her destiny to get back with her Buddy, and wouldn’t let logic or reason get in the way. Patton Oswalt did a pretty good job, most of his roles are comic relief funny fat guy, but his character was super damn important in this movie, and had a lot more subtle humor.

When I thought about The Adventures of Tintin as a crazy CGI movie, I didn’t think much of it. I thought it would probably cost a lot of money and not do so well. I also knew that he probably wouldn’t go to Africa, given his old comics being racist and stuff.

Basically what you need to know about Tintin is he is a guy with a dog, that goes on adventures. He is a journalist, which means he gets around, investigates, and can also solve mysteries. He also knows how to do tons of things, like pilot all types of transportation sources. He probably speaks a lot of languages too, but doesn’t show off. What a well guy

Minus that guys nose, look at that “realism”!

Tintin (Jamie Bell) is just hanging out in Paris. The first time we seem him is actually hilarious. But I don’t want to spoil that joke for you. While looking for his dog, he finds a model Ship made by Sir Francis Haddock (Obvious reference to Drake is obvious), who was a famous sailor and rich, and had a ship named a Unicorn. Immediately after purchase, a guy tries to buy it from him (with a warning), then Rackham (Daniel Craig), an old rich guy tries to do the same. He seems evil, and this is a CGI movie, so he is.

Eventually Tintin finds a note stuk in the ship, written in another language and a poem. Eventually he also finds out that Rackham has a ship identical to his with a different note. Can these notes combined lead to a secret buried treasure?

Shooting, and kidnapping, and escaping happen, and Tintin finds himself on a boat (motherfucker, on a boat) where he meets Captain Haddock (Andy Serkis). The captain of the baot who is locked away in his room after a mutiny, with nothing but his rum. They eventually escape and realize there is a third clue. Also, clearly the Captain is a descendant Sir Francis, and wants to help out Tintin. But they have to race against Rackham and his crew, who want to stop them, and find the treasure first.

There is also Thomson (Nick Frost) and Thompson (Simon Pegg), two very similar bumbling constables, who want to help Tintin. I think?

Seriously. No idea if they are out to get him, or help him, or if all of their success is stealing the work he does and captures people?

Did you like that shitty plot description? I skipped a lot and left a lot out because A LOT OF THINGS happen in this movie. Holy crap, is there action.

Oddly enough this film is PG. The Captain is drunk 90% of his screen time, and one of the major plot points in the desert is that he gets sober and can’t remember certain things so they have to find him alcohol. What!? Also lots of guns. People in the movie die to guns, even. No blood spatter. But shot. In a pg movie! And smoking! I guess you can do anything in CGI eh?

I liked it all though. It was crazy to watch. Chase scenes, different countries, and a pirate hallucination that was super epic.

My one big complaint, which is true of the comic too (and thus true to the film?) is the dog. The dog just felt like one giant Deus Ex Machina, again and again. The dog was responsible for most of the plot advancement, randomly running away, randomly finding things etc. Just felt lazy that it kept happening over and over.

But really, it was a pretty nifty adventure that Tintin guy went on.