Gorgon Reviews

People Like Us is a movie that actually went to theaters, but I never really heard of it. Heck, still in theaters. I only knew about it because I saw a preview for it in WTEWYE, and was like “Hey, I’ll watch that!” You know. Because I will watch anything.

The cast didn’t hurt the cause either.

Sam (Chris Pine) hates his dad. He also works a potentially sketch job where he buys overstocked goods and trades them to other countries, for profit. Bartering stuff. Currently living with girlfriend Hannah (Olivia Wilde), who is applying to law school, living the dream in NYC. But hey look, he gets in trouble with his job and then his dad dies. Awk. Despite his best attempts, he flies out to LA for the funeral to hang out with his mom (Michelle Pfeiffer). Their relationship is bit strange.

On the will, all he Sam gets is his dads old records, until the lawyer shows up and lets him know of another secret thing left behind. A shaving kit with 150 thousand dollars inside. Hooray! But a note? To give to some kid, Josh Davies (Michael Hall D’Addario). But why? Time to be a spy. He look, he has a mom, that makes since, Frankie (Elizabeth Banks). But she sees upset. Apparently her dad died too.

What’s that, secret family?! Oh shit. Now Sam has a half sister and half-nephew (?) that he never knew about, and has to give him all this money when he himself is having financial trouble? Well clearly the only thing left to do is enter their lives on a false pretense, and learn more about his secret family, before telling them the truth and the money he holds.

Also, Mark Duplass plays a neighbor and very small role.

“So I am just going to be sketch and in your life, and drive your kid around. Is that cool?”

This movie got pretty intense at times, and man did Chris Pine get smacked a lot. Too much. Come on people, women beating on men shouldn’t be seen as okay either.

Also, this movie got super weird at times. Keeping the fact that you are a half brother a secret to your half sister? Super sketch, especially if both people are attractive and you are way overly nice.

Overall I found most of the acting to be pretty good for the film, that was also touching at the same time. It is one of those call your parents right after and fix your problems, movies. Or else you know, regret. Death and shit.

But at the same time it was far too slow at parts, and the whole plotline involving him avoiding the law and getting jail time was super weird. They definitely didn’t flesh that out, just swept it under the rug, and ignored it. That bugged me a lot, finish your storyline.

But still, the ending? Dawwwwwww.

Dark Shadows!…Did anyone go see this film in theaters? I mean really? I don’t think I heard a single person thinking “Yes! Time to watch a remake of a 60s Soap Opera!”

Not saying that it was a bad decision to turn Dark Shadows into a movie. First off, I’ve actually seen that show. Like, maybe up to 20 episodes. Who cares if it has over a thousand? Shut up. It was eerie when I was a kid. Secondly, 21 Jump Street just happened. It was a movie version of an older TV show, changed the genre, and was awesome. So why not Dark Shadows?

Oh yeah. Erm.

The Collins family moved to New England from Britain way back in the 1700s, and pretty much founded their own town with their richness, Collinsport. Port, yes, because they do fishing business and continued to grow their fortune. Their son, Barnabus (Johnny Depp) was falling in love with a maid, Angelique Bouchard (Eva Green), but the parents would not allow it. Then the parents were killed. Whoops. Turns out Angelique is a witch, and got pissed off. Didn’t stop Barnabus from falling in love with another woman, who ended up killing herself under a curse. Barnabus tries to kill himself, but whoops, he’s now a vampire because Angelique is a mean mean person, and then becomes imprisoned for the next 200 years.

Hey look, the 1970s. Collinsport is now barely Collins owned territory. The house in shambles, the fortune all mostly gone and shit. Elizabeth (Michelle Pfeiffer) is now the head of the house, and has a 15 year old daughter Carolyn (Chloe Grace Moretz). Elizabeth’s brother Roger (Jonny Lee Miller) is an asshole, single father after the wife drowned, with a younger son David (Guilliver McGrath). He is kind of messed up, so they have a psychiatrist there, Dr. Julia Hoffman (Helan Bonham Carter). Oh yeah, also a housekeeper Willie (Jackie Earle Haley) who has to work too hard for one guy.

Either way, they need a governess for David, and mysterious Victoria Winters (Bella Heathcote) answers the call.

BUT WHO CARES, BARNABUS RETURNS. Joins the family, wants to get their business back up, restore the name, and woo Victoria. But witches. And he is a vampire. Oh man, shenanigans.

Dem eyes.

So, from what I can tell, this movie is a lot like the show in many ways. No one really cared about the show too much until Barnabus joined the cast, like 200 episodes in, then it became a huge hit. So much like the show, Victoria was the main character early on, after all the back story, until Barnabus came back, and then she only had a few scenes. With Barnabus, and not too many lines. Bugged me.

Overall, I found the entire movie to be too ridiculous, so maybe that is keeping itself true to its soap opera roots? But found it hard to get in to. It really didn’t feel like Dark Shadows, due to its attempt to be a big comedy. I almost think this would have been better received if it tried again to be its own story that had nothing to do with Dark Shadows characters/names/pseudo-plots.

I thought Helena was aweful in the film, and Jonny Lee Miller was pointless as well. My favorite casting choice was probably Haley as the groundskeeper, he did make me laugh.

But overall, this just didn’t feel entertaining to me, and felt like every other recent Burton/Depp movie.

Babies, babies, so many babies. Well not as many babies (or as intense) as the movie Babies, but there is still quite a few in What To Expect When You’re Expecting.

Also, as you’d expect, there is a lot of talk about genitalia, so if you hate the word vagina, or the many different versions of that word possible, you might be uncomfortable in this film. But you don’t have to see any. Not like in Babies.

“Now I want y’all to repeat after me: penis, penis, penis; vagina, vagina, vagina!”

Given the large nature of this comedy, and the fact that it is about 5~ different couples/storylines that are loosely connected going through pregnancy related stories, this is another review where I just have to show off the different characters. Yay ‘easy’ to type plot lines.

Jules (Cameron Diaz) is a fitness instructor for a Biggest Loser like show, and on a Dancing With The Stars like show, with professional dancer Evan (Matthew Morrison). They have a few month fling, and whoops pregnant. So they have to try their hand at a relationship, that is scrutinized in the tabloids/media, while they fight over every baby thing, but mostly just circumcision.

Holly (Jennifer Lopez) can’t actually have a baby and wants to adopt. But her husband Alex (Rodrigo Santoro) seems to be having a problem getting into the adoption process fully. They also have to deal with monetary issues, and looking for a new house, while Alex is forced to join a Dad Squad. A group of new~ dad’s (Chris Rock, Rob Huebel, Amir Talai, Thomas Lennon) who go on long walks with their kids, talk about problems, support each other, don’t judge, and also weirdly idolize a local athlete (Joe Manganiello).

Rosie (Anna Kendrick) runs a cheese based food truck with her friends, competing with the other local food trucks, including a pork based food truck ran by Marco (Chase Crawford). They almost had a fling in high school, but bad things happened and they never hit it off. But once the heat of the competition happens, they find themselves in a one night sexy time, which of course, leads to pregnancy. Now they have to try to figure out what to do, when they aren’t even in a real relationship.

Wendy (Elizabeth Banks) runs a strange mother shop, full of pregnancy items and books and accessories, and has been trying for two years to get pregnant with her husband Gary (Ben Falcone). Once it finally occurs, she is so happy, yet she seems to get none of the benefits of pregnancy, only the negative side effects. Where is her glow damn it? She also has an assistant to help run her shop, Janice (Rebel Wilson) who has no idea about anything.

But unfortunately for them, Gary’s dad is a big hot shot race car driver. Or else he used to be. Now Ramsey (Dennis Quaid) lives in a mansion, and has everything going right for him (minus his relationship with his son). He even has a younger (than his son) wife, Skyler (Brooklyn Decker). And after one try, boom pregnant as well. And twins! She also has the perfect pregnancy, no problems at all, keeps her amazing looks, and no worries.

So pretty much everything that could deal with pregnancy at all, involving adoption, fertilization, marriage problems, weight gain, miscarriages, c-sections, drugs, PRETTY MUCH EVERYTHING EVER, that could deal with the babies. You know, so you can expect it all.

The female Jonah Hill was in this movie. Almost everything said is quotable.

So yeah, pregnancy, am I right?

True story, I laughed in this film, and maybe even cried. Some stuff was touching, and I almost was going to be pissed at the ending (but thankfully the event in question didn’t happen).

Really this movie is like four movies in one, all with the topic of starting a family. Some of these movies would be great on their own too, such as the Kendrick/Chase plot line. Loved it. I think the Banks/Falcone + Quaid storyline would make on its own a decent movie as well, but it is kind of the main plot line in this movie so not as necessary. Diaz/Morrison? That one was pretty weak. Lopez/Santoro would have probably just been a lame comedy, in the vein of Grown Ups or Daddy Day Care.

But man, was Rebel Wilson pretty funny. Most of the time. Good for her. Anna Kendrick also kicked ass, and not just because of my mini-crush on her. Glad she is out of the Twilight films now, so she can do more roles, instead of 5s of footage in those films.

Rock Of Ages is probably going to be another biased review. I’ve had the soundtrack for the musical for probably a couple years now. Wanted to see it since I first heard about it and love the soundtrack. Lots of mixes between songs, and interesting ways to do them. So when I heard about the movie version, I knew I had to see it as well.

So finally, months later, I got a chance to, hooray! Time to rawwwk!

I said rawk, damn it. Not stand their and look solemn.

This story is mainly about a small town girl and a city boy. Drew Boley (Diego Boneta) is working as a bar aid at the famous The Bourbon, a concert hall / bar in LA. A city some may say was built on rock and roll. Sherrie Christian (Julianne Hough) had just arrived from Oklahoma and looking to be a famous singer! She of course gets mugged right away, and Drew kind of saves her. But not really. They immediately hit it off, and Drew gets her a job as a waitress at the Bourbon, despite the owner, Dennis Dupree’s (Alec Baldwin), negative reaction to it. But thankfully Lonny (Russel Brand), the second in command and MC seems pretty cool with it all.

A new mayor is getting elected in LA, Mike Whitmore (Bryan Cranston) who’s wife, Patricia (Catherine Zeta-Jones) is going to help clean up the streets. Using good christian values, and the best way to do that is to get rid of rock and roll! The center of it all, The Bourbon. Who also happen to be having tax problems.

But no worries, Arsenal, the kickest ass band ever, who played their first gig at The Bourbon is coming the next night to play their final gig, before frontman Stacee Jaxx (Tom Cruise) starts his solo career. Big money time! And Drew is going to get to open for them! Oh man! Everything is going wonderful!

Until it doesn’t. Sexy stuff happens, miss-communications, Stacee is a crazy ass person, and love dies. The dream dies. The Christians win? With Malin Akerman as Rolling Stones reporter trying to find the real Stacee Jaxx, Mary J. Blige as a strip club owner, Paul Giamatti as scumbag manager, and Will Forte as local news reporter, will they eventually be able to save The Bourbon from being demolished? Will they ever stop believing?

Will they actually hit them with their best shot?

It should be noted that this musical, although the characters don’t know they are in a musical (like some of them do in Broadway) definitely makes fun of itself, and isn’t going for a serious thing. They just want nothing but a good time. And I belive they definitely deliver. The music is fun and catchy, lots of great songs and mash ups, and yet it is incredibly different from the broadway version.

I’m not negatively comparing, just noting, they have entirely different plots, and only the same main main characters. This lead to awesome moments, like the church dance scene for Hit Me With Your Best shot. Unfortuantely that was my second favorite song on the original soundtrack, as it had a german guy singing it, and it sounded amazing. Similarly, my favorite song was a mash up of Heaven / More Than Words / To Be With You, but in the movie they took out the Mr. Big parts, so no mash ups were ever 3+ songs.

They also in general had to cut out a lot of songs, and added new one ins, but kept some of the jokes. I mean, making the girl named Sherrie still, but cutting out Oh Sherrie? That’s just cruel.

But besides that, the movie felt pretty awesome. Some problems include Sherrie doing pretty much the same thing in every song it felt like (walking down the street belting lyrics. every damn time) and once they introduce Mary J. Blige she was also pretty much a part of every song after that, despite barely making sense.

But hey. The REO Speedwagon duet between Baldwin and Brand is reason alone to see this musical.

I saw probably two trailers for Moonrise Kingdom, with neither of them answering really anything at all. I did know that it was a Wes Anderson movie, of which I have only liked one. But to be fair, I have only seen two…

I am sure someone is reading this review because they heard I disliked Bill Murray and heard I only like him in cameos. Well. I won’t let any perceived actor hatred from giving this movie its full attention and chance to wow me. No fear good sirs.

Uh oh, famous people alert.

Honestly, I have a hard time trying to explain just what this movie is about. The easiest way is to just explain some of the characters and location.

The setting is in 1965 at a fictional New England island of New Penzance. Pretty small. Nearby is a few other islands too. But small, has a ferry system, and no paved roads.

The first family introduced is the Bishops, Walt (Murray) and Laura (Frances McDormand). They have three young boys, and an older daughter at twelve named Suzy (Kara Hayward). She may be dysfunctional, and likes binoculars.

There is only one police officer for the whole island, Captain Sharp (Bruce Willis) and not the smartest man out there. There is a local camp set up for some Khaki Scouts, lead by Scout Master Ward (Edward Norton), who is a math teacher normally. He runs his camp with authority, and makes sure not too many shenanigans occur. But when it is found out that Sam (Jared Gilman), an orphan kid who no one likes has retired from the Scouts, run away and stolen a canoe, it drives the Island into panic!

Mostly indifference, but still, he can’t have gone that far.

This leads to a grand adventure of love, and longing. Where adults act childish, and children act like adults. Where books are read, and where coves are named. Jason Schwartzman also appears as “Cousin Ben” and Harvey Keitel as Commander Pierce, head of the Khaki Scouts and working on the local Hullabaloo.

Still don’t know what this movie is about? Bitch, she’s a raven!

Fucking Wes Anderson! How dare he do an amazing movie like this.

Everything felt top notch about this movie. Everything was so weird and I love weird. The music? It was both in your face, and felt appropriate. But the real level of amazing would be the camera work here. Lot of longer scenes where the camera would just move from left to right as people walked, and things happened in the background, and the movie carried on. The color schemes between the scenes, they were noticeable and overpowering, but yet it also added so much to the island of New Penzance.

I can’t even tell if the acting was that good? The main kid performances was full of “awwww”, and I love movies that give me stuff like that. You know, like Flipped.

The movie is really hard to explain, but I really loved it. Was on the edge of my seat for a while. I did find it odd that I was pretty much the only one laughing in my theater of 12-15~ people for most of the jokes. But those guys are just jerks I guess.

Project X, oh no, another hand held camera movie.

Oh noooooooooooooo.

Just kidding, I don’t care. It is not a “found footage” of the events after the fact. It is just a style to make it seem more realistic. They also used some camera footage from other party goers, and the news report, sure, but outside of that? Mostly just the one camera man.

The heroes of our story. Everyone loves them!

All of these characters have the same first name as their real name, so why not assume they share last names too? Thomas Mann is about to be a real man, by US standards, not Jewish ones. He is turning 18 AND his parents are leaving him for the weekend. What?! He is a good kid. They trust him. No way he ruins the trust. Just a few friends can come over, he can borrow the van, but not the good car, simple enough.

His friends are dedicated to making it special, especially Oliver Cooper, his friend with “connections”. He knows where to get drugs, how to spread the word and get hotties to come. Allegedly. Him and Jonathan Daniel Brown are doing it mainly to get laid, of course, and get their friend laid. Pretty much the reason why teens do anything.

But who is behind the camera? Some AV club emo dude, Dax Flame. Don’t worry about him. Also there is another member of their gang, Kirby Bliss Blanton, but she is a girl, and therefore isn’t as important. Minus the fact that she might like Thomas.

But they got this thing ready. Drugs, alcohol, DJs, signage, and security, by two younger guys Brady Hender and Nick Nervies. Heck, they even think Miles Teller is going to be there, a local college superstar, and that means the possibility of college chicks.

Needless to say, the party grows to unexpected proportions. The party goes inside, extra drugs are found, older people show up, police can’t do shit, neighbors are mad, midgets in the oven, naked legal chicks, pool party, and a day that they will remember forever. For all the wrong reasons.

Just a little bit out of hand.

So against all expectations, this movie kept me entertained basically the whole time I was watching it. Which was a problem because I was trying to pack up some things at the same time. Very little packing got done.

It is hard to explain the appeal of this movie to me. The plot is just about a party that gets really fucking crazy. And I was almost scared at what would happen. Everything kept getting worse and worse, and it was clear there was no turning back or saving these people from the ramifications. And it was intense.

It is pretty obvious what this movie is about, and expectations should match that for an appropriate experience.

Darwin Darwin Darwin.

Who would have thought a movie called Creation was a biographical-ish movie about Mr. Charles? Seems pretty silly. But I guess it is about his struggles with discerning natural selection, and his “battle” against Creation.

Alright why not, his life is probably riveting.

Oh, I see what they did there.

Charles Darwin (Paul Bettany) loves him some biology. And family! Especially his daughter, Annie (Martha West). She loves to hear stories, and thankfully he has a whole bunch. Because fifteen years prior, he went on this fantastic voyage to the Galapagos Islands. So since then he has been home, working on his discoveries, and trying to figure out this dang evolution thing.

His wife Emma? She hates this shit. Emma (Jennifer Connelly) is more religious than a Chinese fruit basket, so she doesn’t like the potential implications of the findings of his research. She thinks she will be in heaven and he won’t make it if he publishes the book, and they will be separated throughout eternity.

Turns out also that daughter he loved died awhile ago, weak genes or something, and he is just moping. Doesn’t want to kill god, doesn’t want to make wife mad, but can’t just ignore this stuff. So most of the movie is him trying to properly grieve over the death of his daughter and rekindle his marriage, with some Galapagos island stories, a monkey, and other science.

WILL HE DECIDE TO PUBLISH HIS BOOK THOUGH? I do not know.

Like I said, it is his favorite kid. >.>

Kind of a short plot summary eh? Well I mean, it is pseudo biographical. I think they cut out a lot of his children, and probably just exaggerated how much it affected him. I mean, Charles Darwin, he is a scientist, probably not seeing a ghost of his daughter.

Unfortunately for me, I found this tale to be quite boring. If I wanted a full biography of him, I’d like some stuff as he grew up as well, before his wife, actual life story, not just the important 15 years. I’d also want post book publishing implications.

However much of this is true, I can’t say, but over half of it is just awkward guilt and grieving, so not really what I expected.

I claim to be pretty nerdy on this site, yet almost every time it seems something nerdy comes up, I claim to not be that type of nerd.

This is another example of one of those times. Star Trek? Never really watched any of it. The amount I know about it is the amount I am supposed to know as a pop culture fanatic. I know some of the quoted famous lines, who a couple captains were played by, and that is about it. So hey, this film just has to appeal to those characteristics and be entertaining to watch for me to enjoy it.

Ah, Lens Flare. Makes me think of outer space. I doubt they used enough.

Movie begins not with the crew we love. Its other people. Who totally get attacked my Romulans, when they thought it was just a lightning storm. Turns out they are from the future, and want to kill some Spock dude. Whoops. Too early in time. Nero (Eric Bana), their leader doesn’t care. They continue to attack, killing the captain, leaving George Kirk (Chris Hemsworth) in charge, who orders the fleet to evacuate while he steers the ship on his own into the Romulans. His pregnant wife, Winona (Jennifer Morrison) gives birth to her son in the escape pod, James Tiberius Kirk (Chris Pine), while her husband, you know dies. Totally was a captain for a whole 10 minutes, but at least he saved lives.

Many years later, Kirk is a troublesome son. Smart, but doesn’t make something of his life. He could easily join the starfleet, be an officer in four years, and Captain a ship in eight. But he is lazy. Pike (Bruce Greenwood), a captain convinces him to try otherwise, and he enters star fleet. Definitely not just for a girl, Uhura (Zoe Saldana), an alien language expert.

Three years later, he is doing the Officer test. So soon! He ends up “cheating” some how to pass the test, which is supposed to be unwinnable, made by Spock (Zachary Quinto) himself. Half Vulcan, half Human, who joined Star Fleet instead of a science academy because he didn’t like the discrimination and perceived weaknesses. Eventually a distress signal is found near Vulcan, sending the academy into a panic and sending their entire fleet. Kirk is able to sneak aboard the Enterprise, thanks to the help of his doctor friend Bones (Karl Urban).

Hey look, a lot of other famous characters I have heard referenced before. Like Chekov (Anton Yelchin), a navigator and weird guy, and Sulu (John Cho), playing as George Takei. Scotty (Simon Pegg) gets there eventually.

So yeah, Romulans. They are mad. They set up a trap for the whole fleet! Can the Enterprise survive the attack, save the Vulcans, figure out what time travel shenanigans are going on, and save the day? Sure. But also, Leonard Nimoy.

In Star Trek for 5 minutes. Lands Thor part because of it.

Hey look, this film gave me pretty much everything I wanted in a Star Trek movie, as a non Trekkie, that’s great! My biggest complaint would just be weird technical aspects that tended to take me out of the setting.

Yes, lens flare indeed was an excessive problem. But then just little things that bugged me. Like little Kirk, driving the car and running away from the cops. He turns on the radio, and Sabotage from Beastie Boys comes on. So okay, car is playing music. I’m fine with that. But then car goes over cliff, he jumps out, car super far away, music still loud as ever, now it is just background music? Can’t do that shit to me. That bugs the crap out of me.

I think they did do a pretty good job dealing with a time traveling/parallel universe time line, and used it as a good way to explain why this is different than the TV show.

A lot of times when figuring out what a movie is about you can break down the words in the title to get a good clue.

For Echelon Conspiracy, there is two words. Conspiracy? Alright, government is probably involved, a cover up, crime and shit. Fun.

Echelon? Alright well fuck you too movie.

Even the main characters can’t figure out the Echelon part ahead of time.

Max Peterson (Shane West) works for a security company, specifically computer based technologies, and is overseas finishing installation to a system. When he checks into his hotel, he receives a package. Inside the package? A wicked cool new cell phone. Sweet. He assumes it is from the hotel, and receives a text telling him to stay an extra day, and why not, he does. Turns out his original flight home crashed. Whoops. That would have sucked, you know dying.

He is unable to tell where the cell phone comes from, but it keeps giving him good advice with texts. So why not follow him. Heck, it even takes him to a casino, tells him which machine to go to, and how far it is from a jackpot. And shit, he is right about that too. Takes his money to a black jack table, told to bet it all, black jack. Shit is crazy! Casino doesn’t like that. Head of security John Reed (Edward Burns) is trying to figure out whats up with his luck, notes his phone and they make him turn it off. But now he loves gambling and the money. He contacts a Russian cab driver Yuri Malanin (Sergey Gubanov) he had earlier, who sells accessories, to let him turn his texts into voice into an earpiece. Yay more cheating!

But once he gets a even bigger jackpot, security tries to throw him out when he is instead intercepted by Agent Dave Grant (Ving Rhames). Oh shit, the NSA? Apparently other people have received these messages/phones, all random people. First comes wealth, then random instructions, then death. Max is the only one they have found alive before that happens and want to find out where the texts are coming from.

Even the head of the NSA (Martin Sheen) gets involved. But shit really hits the fan when they find out it is coming from Echelon, a very smart computer device they have built, to protect America and what America stands for. But no one is using Echelon, which has access to all phones/emails/security cameras, to do this. Nope. The machine has become sentient, and is planning something potentially catastrophic.

Also, there is a random girl played by Tamara Feldman who doesn’t really add anything to the movie in my eyes.

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Holy fuck why are your eyes that big?!

I loved this movie. Well, the beginning. It was a lot more entertaining when it was secretive still. But after it turned into a sentient computer, and wondering what it wanted, there was still over half the movie to go. Hmm. Seems to lose its appeal at that point. Why not just stop doing what it says? Except for the fact that it will choose someone else, but still, calm down guys. If you know what is doing it, make it stop at the source, and you are good.

They just take forever to get to that conclusion, and try to throw a lot of ethical freedom stuff in the movie, that isn’t at all clever, and all kind of lame.

I am surprised it had a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, but only like 12 people reviewed it. Not the normal (hundreds?) Not sure. Weird site.

Good beginning, bad everything else. For shame.

“Uh oh, it is a John Malkovich movie. Better not try to multi-task this movie.”

That is an exact quote from me before watching Disgrace. Disgrace being a novel about post-Apartheid South Africa (or the Best South Africa in my book!). I mean, the author actually received a Nobel Prize in Literature a few years after writing this. I didn’t even know they had one of those, because hey, I barely know what books are.

Who would have thought so much love would be given to a professor who had a relationship with one of his students?

This is the walk of a man who is giving zero fucks about his situation.

Shit, I might have given away most of the plot I can tell already.

Professor David Lurie (Malkovich) is a Professor (shut up) in South Africa (said that already). But what you didn’t know is that he teaches English! Romantic poems and stuff. Through flirtatious glances and the such, he develops a relationship with Soraya (Natalie Becker) even though she has a boyfriend and is in his class. Oh well, she’s hot, sex hooray! No way he could be taking advantage of her in this situation, right?

Well, word gets out and the university doesn’t like it. He is brought before a board, admits to everything, and is promptly dismissed. He doesn’t care though. He just wants to live his life, now that he is in his 50s and divorced and miserable. So he leaves his South African city and goes to a different South African place, to live with his daughter Lucy (Jessica Haines) who is a simple farmer, living in a small community, and a lesbian.

David volunteers at a local pet clinic, but the job is a pretty sad one. Mostly getting rid of unwanted dogs. He starts a relationship with the clinic owner. Lucy is in a business relationship with Petrus (Eriq Ebouaney), a black farmer who shares the land. But while he goes away on a business trip, a horrible event happens. Three younger gentlemen go to their farm, rob them, assault them, and Lucy is raped.

Not the most ideal situation, but David is even more shocked when Lucy refuses to persecute the criminals (post-Apartheid is a weird time in South Africa. Race relations unstable) and not be a bother to the community. She also becomes pregnant.

Will David realize the power others can actually hold over others based on their position? Will he change at all? What the hell South Africa?

“Hey now, this time it wasn’t me. I’m white!”

I know, I know this is going to sound weird. But this plot didn’t interest me at all. It had lots of things a good drama needed, but I never could get attached to the main characters and it all bounced right off of me. The rubber effect. Too bad I couldn’t have been an emotional glue.

This is an example of a film where I could recognize the good acting and work to make the film, but still not give a damn either way. The worst reviews for me to write, because I can never really give a good reasoning behind it. I mean, maybe it was just too slow? I don’t know. But some how a wall was put up, and I guess I won’t watch it again.