Tag: Rosemarie DeWitt

La La Land gets the honor of most anticipated film of 2016. Yes, it even beats Doctor Strange, which I have been waiting for years.

I was told Damien Chazelle (who just gave us Whiplash), plus musical, plus two wonderful stars and I knew I just had to see it. And then it got pushed back! Several times, to the wonderful Oscar seasons, meaning more waiting and more desire.

The good review hype just made my train go even stronger. If anything, by the time I saw it, I was disappointed it wasn’t a four hour long movie.

And now that I have seen it, my hype has immediately switched to next years Christmas release of The Greatest Showman starring Hugh Jackman.

I just really like dancing and musicals, get over it.

Sebastian (Ryan Gosling) is a great pianist, lover of jazz, and a dreamer. Mia (Emma Stone) is an aspiring actress, not successful, former writer kind of, and hey, a dreamer.

So of course they meet in one warm winter, LA evening and things go, well, they don’t go. But then they meet again later and something starts to flicker on between them. Romance, hopes, dreams. And hey, a song and dance number.

Sebastian wants to open up his own jazz club, at a historic location, to bring the genre back to the public, but he also might sell out his skills to make money in the mean time with an old (poppy) friend (John Legend). Mia is tired of going to auditions against girls prettier and more experienced than her, getting her no where, so she puts more of her focus towards creating a play that she can star in herself, to get her name out.

And then there is romance, hopes, and more romance.

But love can’t be the only thing in a relationship. Can they even last a year with their goals, or more?

Also featuring Callie Hernandez, Jessica Rothe, Sonoya Mizuno, Rosemarie DeWitt, J.K. Simmons, and Finn Wittrock.

The only pictures from this movie involve dancing, and hey, even they are getting over it now.

This has been a very hard review to write. First off, I didn’t really want to watch it until I could listen to the soundtrack in its entirety, and thankfully that came out December 9th. The soundtrack isn’t actually that long, and quite a few songs are instrumental only. But the music is something special and for most of the soundtrack, just sitting down and hearing the music is a wonderful thing. Jazz heavily influences the soundtrack, which should not come to a surprise given the director’s previous film and the subject matter. Let’s start at the beginning.

The opening song is what appears to be one long shot, for minutes, involving dozens of extras, cars, and hijacking the LA Freeway at some point for presumably days to practice and get it all right. It gets you in the mood and sets you up. The second song, a bit stranger, but ends on a strong note and really gets the message going. And those two songs are our “classic” musical songs, for the most part. They ooze out nostalgia from the 1940’s and 50’s, with dancing, color and more.

This does continue into A Lovely Night, which gives a modern sarcastic feel to it all, finally including our main two leads fully, and a huge (once again long take) dance number. It is truly a wonder to watch and it made me annoyed that I was in a theater and couldn’t just rewind and see it again and again.

Eventually we get to the main theme of City of Stars, which is hauntingly beautiful and won’t annoy you the many times it comes up, humming, singing or otherwise. City of Stars and The Fools Who Dream are the emotional pinnacle points of the film and are reasons why this film is having so much buzz.

La La Land is about acting, dreamers, with a shit ton of nostalgia and classic feel. I ignored the fact that I saw cell phones early on and assumed it was set in the 50’s until the Prius joke brought me back down from my cloud. La La Land is an experience that deserves the big screen, deserves multiple viewings and will be a musical staple for some time to come. The actors relationship feels real, their love and their arguments. This is the third time Gosling/Stone have been together in a film, after Crazy, Stupid, Love and Gangster Squad (which was a travesty).

Go see one of the best films of the year. The hype is real. Go dream or go home.

Ah, horror remakes. We need at least one a year right? We’ve had Carrie, Evil Dead, Fright Night, and many more. It is easy and hip and cool to do. Hell, I know it sounds like I wrote that like a sarcastic asshat, but for those three films in particular I ended up liking them or thinking they were okay enough as a remake. I didn’t hate any of them.

Then Poltergeist flashed its way onto our screens like a lightning bolt. “Not so fast, mother fucker!” it clamored through the speaker box.

I may be jumping the gun with the review, but Poltergeist decided that instead of making a nice modern update with its remake, it would instead just…take more of the same elements from the original, cut out a lot of the horror bits, and instead turn it into more of a Sci-Fi Thriller. Yeah. Fuck the original, right?

And always fuck clowns, obviously. As long as its consensual and not Vulgar.

Big day for the Bowen family! They just got a new house. And hey, it is really low because of the stagnant market. Definitely not because no one would buy it. And it doesn’t have many neighbors. Who cares. They can afford it, which is the most important thing in this economy. They don’t have much of an income right now. The dad, Eric (Sam Rockwell), insists that his wife, Amy (Rosemarie DeWitt) not have to go back to work, because they can totally get through this without that. So yeah, Eric is kind of a dick.

Either way, they have their three kids, Kendra (Saxon Sharbino), Griffin (Kyle Catlett), and Madison (Kennedi Clements), in order of oldest to youngest. Kendra is DGAF oldest sister, so you can ignore her. Madison is the one who starts saying things and talking to entities in her room alone. Griffin is the only one who believes that something weird is happening.

Either way, outside of funky static TV stuff, other electronics are also acting wonky. It turns out that this house used to be built on an Indian Burial site. That was decades ago (Oh man, is this technically a sequel!?). But weird stuff happened and people got angry, so they had to pay a settlment, I think, and agreed to move the graveyard to a different location. Well, then why the fuck are spirits still angry? Why are they somehow bring the barrier between worlds and stealing their youngest daughter?

Also featuring Jane Adams— and Jared Harris.

Maybe this is a metaphor for letting the TV be your nanny?

Poltergeist has about three scary moments in it. Maybe. Calling it a horror film almost feels ludicrious. It has a lot of other things though!

It has a lot of zero character growth. Rockwell’s character is completely cardboard. A completely unrealistic person given anything that happens in the movie, and even more sadly, he doesn’t even dance. The mom and older daughter role are almost completely unimportant.

It is all about little boy and little girl. And occasionally some adult comes around and does something, but when the girl gets sucked away (for a majority of the film I guess), it is mostly up to Catlett to keep us entertained. He does an okay job, in terms of kid stuff. But he cannot save this boring mess of a film.

That’s right. The biggest shame of this remake is not that it isn’t scary, it is the boringness of it all. It honestly feels like they went so light and fluffy with the whole thing that they wanted it to actually be a PG horror film. It was hard to get through because of how uninteresting it became after only 15 or so minutes.

Mini-Theme!

While watching Margot At The Wedding, I couldn’t help but think of Rachel Getting Married. They have similar-ish titles, obviously a similar theme, and are both super indie movies. How do I define indie movie? Low budget, usually very dramatic, and of course, having the camera follow a character as they walk.

Usually they follow from behind, but the side walk is also very popular.

Oh yeah, Rosemarie DeWitt. Her existence basically screams out that the movie you are about to watch is an indie film. She is the titular Rachel, and by golly, she is indeed getting married. But the movie really isn’t about her. It is about her sister, Kym (Anne Hathaway), playing a role to keep her from getting typecasted.

That is because Kym is currently checked into rehab, the drug kind, not the alcohol kind. She has been given a few days off to attend her sister’s wonderful wedding, even though there is a lot of drama in her family.

Her dad (Bill Irwin) is worried for her well being, but Kym interprets it as mistrust, not caring. Her sister ended up picking her friend to be the maid of honor, not Kym, so she dislikes that as well. Sure, Kym while on drugs got into a car accident which killed their younger brother Ethan, but why would that be a problem now? (That is a joke).

Rachel is also upset that during her wedding, a weekend literally to celebrate her, is turning into a Kym-fest, with all focus on her. Boo that.

But wait, there is more. The mother (Debra Winger) is involved as well, and isn’t even at the house the weekend of the wedding. She is only coming the day of. Yep, she has some secrets into this broken family as well.

But by the end, there are big hugs for all to enjoy!

I actually saw this movie first a few years ago (and here is a secret, I didn’t rewatch it for this review, shh. That is a first for me, okay!). I did it because at the time, I had a bit of an obsession with Anne Hathaway (still do?), so it was exciting to see her in a role that she was nominated for Best Actress in! I’ve only seen three of the movies of the five that had Best Actress in them, but I reluctantly agree that she probably didn’t deserve the win. Kate Winslet was baller that year. And since Anne got the Best Supporting Actress award a few years later, all is fine anyways.

None of this is about the movie, which moved a bit slow for my taste. Sure, it was a very different look/role for Anne, which she did do awesome at, but the film dragged on for me. I think it was 20-30 minutes too long, for the story that we actually got. The ending was a bit touching. The movie was going for realism, but by doing so, took out the entertainment factor. Although the acting was good, and the plot was relatively original, I think it lacked in enough other places for me to leave the movie disappointed.

Oh well. They can’t all be tear jerkers. I should probably hurry and watch Doubt and Frozen River to see if Kate Winslet really did deserve it that year, though. (Probably. Did you see The Reader?)

Actor names can be hard to remember. In particular, Ellen Page is somehow a name that can constantly leave my memory. She is just Juno to me. Why would she dare have a different name than Juno?

I have talked before about watching a movie, thinking Ellen Page was in it, and then bam, its actually Juno Temple and I am not a smart man.

SO, when I saw Touchy Feely, really the only reason I decided to watch it as fast as I did was because Ellen Page was in it. A sort of redemption for my past dumb self. This may be one of the silliest intros I have done for a movie.

Don’t blame me, blame my very blurry hands.

As you may have guessed, this is a movie about touching. Kind of sexy, right?

Abby (Rosemarie DeWitt) is a successful massage therapist, so she touches people a lot. She believes in all that energy stuff to go with it, taught to her by her friend mentor Bronwyn (Allison Janney). She is a free, fun loving spirit.

Her brother, Paul (Josh Pais, who voiced Raphael in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles…what?!), is a dentist at a failing clinic. His daughter, Jenny (Page) is his main assistant. But he is uptight and super serious.

The good news for Paul, is after Jenny brings a friend over for a free cleaning, somehow Paul is able to heal a condition he has. Just with a regular cleaning. Word gets out about Paul and his magical touch, and suddenly business is booming, despite no guarantees that he will fix anyone.

The bad news for Abby, is that somehow she has gained an aversion to bodily contact. It suddenly sickens her for any skin on skin contact. Not only is that extremely bad for her business, but also puts a strain on her relationships with friends and lovers.

Also starring Ron Livingston and Scoot McNairy.

I am now betting they did all these hands scenes on purpose. I see you, film maker.

Touchy Feely has a decent story, but its extreme “indie-ness” kind of ruins the story for me. Indie meaning independent or low budget release, which stereotypically means the movie will move a lot slower and let the fantastic acting carry it through. This movie is incredibly slow, with a lot of silent and thought provoking scenes. Or at least, they are meant to be thought provoking.

I really like the idea of the switch of luck for these two, and the dentist part I find even more bizarre than the massage therapist part. But the rest of the movie is just blah to me.

If only I could talk more about it, but I already ran out of things to say. This movie moves far too slow, with not enough substance, for me to really care. Oh well. Another day, another movie.

Promised Land, on first glance, looks like your typical Oscar Bait movie at the end of the year. After all, it had a super limited release on December 28, but didn’t get widespread release until January. In addition to that, you can tell right off the back it has a high chance of being a super liberal movie with a clear message. We’re talking George Clooney amounts of liberal here. Oh well, maybe it will be subtle about the whole thing?

Fuck.

Steve Butler (Maaaatt Damonnnn) is a closer for a natural gas company. Along with his partner, Sue (Frances McDormand), his job is to go into a community and buy the mining rights on property from the farm owners. They get a set price per acre, and a fraction of the profit they gain, while getting to keep their land for farming. Pretty sweet deal.

Heck, Steve came from a farming community himself in Iowa (what what). But once a local plant went under, the community died, their town crumbled and all was lost. He is providing these communities a safety net, and he is good at it too. But what happens when shit start to hit the fan?

A lot of negative talk about fracking in the news, and now everyone has google, so it is hard to tell who is telling the truth about the risks and why. Steve accidentally lets the community hold a vote on fracking, thanks to a persistent science teacher (Hal Holbrook). Because of that opening, all of the sudden there is an environmental group in town, trying to persuade voters just the same (John Krasinski).

Will Steve lose his mind trying to help the small town? Can he get the girl (Rosemarie DeWitt)? Why does Rob (Titus Welliver, aka The Man In Black from Lost) sell Guns, Groceries, and Guitars?

Do you really not know how this thing will end?

For a movie about fracking, this film took the strange route of not really ever talking about fracking. Heck, Damon’s character is a self claimed not expert on the science, he just buys property and answers questions. They made his character not perfect, not the best speaker if he is nervous (or hungover) to give it a nice realism, but also to make it a crutch. I guess they wanted to make him look like a puppet to the man in the grand scheme of things.

The anti-fracking side doesn’t do much in the use of actual science to defer the town either, both sides using specific tactics to get people trust them. Does that mean this is a fair and balanced movie on the subject? Heck no, and you shouldn’t expect it either. There was a big surprise near the end, but not the ending itself. Everything I expected to happen, did happen. But the surprise I both loved and hated. It was an interesting way to take the movie as a drama, but I hated it because it felt like a cop out and a grossly inaccurate portrayal of real life, which was great up to that point.

I am almost certain this movie won’t go anywhere in terms of awards, was just a meh movie by the end of it. Come on Matt, I expected better of you!

You know what sucks? Getting pregnant. Yes, not being pregnant, but getting to that point. I can tell you I have never been pregnant, and probably never will be pregnant, so I have to assume it is a pretty hard task to accomplish.

So why not make a movie about that, and little kids popping out like plants. Why not tell us about The Odd life Of Timothy Green?

“Oh shit, its hard to hold all these morals! They are dropping everywhere!”

The movie begins with Cindy (Jennifer Garner) and Jim Green (Joel Edgerton) at an adoption agency? Apparently it involves a lot of forms and an interview to plead their case. Under prior experience they have just “Timothy” listed, so now we get a flashback movie! Kind of a bummer, because it then kind of gives away how it ends. But eh, family movie.

The actual story begins with Cindy and Jim finding out they definitely can’t get pregnant. They spent a lot of money, but it won’t happen. Probably Cindy’s fault, who knows. Instead of moving on, they decide to have one drunken night, fantasizing what their kid would have been like. Funny, good at some sort of instrument, not athletic but will score the winning goal for a big game, lover of love, etc. They put this all in a box and bury their son in the garden. What’s that? Freak rain storm? Only over their house!

Hey look, a naked muddy boy is now running around in their house. Dude also has leaves coming out of his legs. That’s more normal. And his name is Timothy Green (CJ Adams). That is their last name! He is a plant with the last name of green. ARE YOU UNDERSTANDING THIS PEOPLE? MAGIC MAN, MAGIC!

Well, after a lot of awkwardness, they decide to not call the cops and just you know, have a son. Too bad they have a giant family picnic the next day and surprise, a kid! Hey, even Jim’s disapproving father (David Morse) showed up, but mostly to terrorize the kids. Cindy has her successful sister (Rosemarie DeWitt) with her multiple successful children also showing up, being all successful and shit. What a bitch.

Either way, Timothy quickly falls head over roots in love with some Joni (Odeya Rush), a girl who is a bit alternative. But hey, friendship. Because we all know what is going to happen to Timothy soon. That is right, he loses a leaf. Interestly enough, he has as many leaves as there were papers in that box. He lost a leaf as soon as he was able to make that uncle dude laugh, and they did want him to be as funny as that uncle dude. I wonder what could happen when all of the box is fulfilled and his leaves lost?

There is also the plot line of the town pencil factory going out of business, and maybe their boss (Ron Livingston) stealing Jim’s idea to save the plant! Oh, and everyone’s favorite actor/rapper with an annoying name Common plays the soccer coach.

That is why that asshole is wearing those socks. Covering up leaves and shit. So now he is the asshole swimming in socks instead. He should fit right in.

Basically, this was your typical family movie about discovering yourself, and a magic entity in your life, albeit temporarily. Laughs are had, lessons learned, and what it means to be a good human. I think.

Despite all that, I guess it was mildly entertaining. The movie also monkey paw’d me right in the throat, and I did not see it coming. Honestly, once I saw their box of attributes each represented a leaf, I immediately knew a few scenes that would happen. But maybe they don’t happen the way you expect em too. They might even have all this build up, just to fuck with you. Totally monkey paw’d.

The Watch had a lot of negative press surrounding it. Unfortunately its first previews started to appear right before the Trayvon Martin shooting down in Florida. Which was done of course by someone on a Neighborhood Watch patrol. Bad timing indeed!

But really this has very little to do with the plot of the movie. Because this movie is dick jokes and aliens.

Lets count how many dicks and aliens you see in this scene.

Evan (Ben Stiller) is a normal middle aged man living in Suburbia in Ohio. He founds a lot of clubs and cares for his community. But bad things happen. Very bad things. Like the security guard at Cotsco, HIS STORE, was brutally murdered and had his skin shaved off. Pretty damn gross. He realizes the cops in the town are pretty incompetent. There are only eight, and the main two hate him (Will Forte and Mel Rodriguez). Plus they think he is a suspect, since he had the ability to get into the store!

Well damn. So Evan founds the Neighborhood Watch while his wife (Rosemarie DeWitt) is away for a weekend, but interest is limited. He gets Bob (Vince Vaughn) a rich man who loves capitalism, but has to raise his daughter (Erin Moriarty) mostly alone because his wife travels for business, and really just wants some nice man friends. There is also Franklin (Jonah Hill) who now lives with his mom, wanted to be a cop, but failed all the tests, including the mental one. And Jamarcus (Richard Ayoade) who also really wants to just hang out/fit in after a divorce, and has an Asian fetish.

This rag tag group of people are forced to do mundane things, until…Evan hits something with his car. And it has green slime! And there is a weird ball that explodes whatever they point it at, assuming they actually finger all the holes. Turns out it is Alien technology, and they might be dealing with a giant alien invasion in their small town Ohio!

I’m sure the creepy skin talking neighbor (Doug Jones) has nothing to do with it. Also Nicholas Braun is in this movie, as guy trying to get with Bob’s daughter. So you know he is going to get fucked up as well. And why does Evan not want to have sex with his own wife? Damn it, Evan.

Oh, so he lets out his steam another way? Do go on.

DICK JOKES. Dick jokes on dick jokes on dick jokes.

Honestly, I’d say that 85% of the humor in this movie was about the male genetalia. It just kept coming up, and came quite frequently. The other 15% would be spread out between some racial/ethnic humor, bromance, and then miscellaneous. But wow.

I didn’t think the plot was that bad. But a movie needs to penalized if it strikes the same funny chord as its go to mechanic. Thankfully the dick jokes were actually, mostly, well connected. But at the same time, it got quite annoying.

Vaughn played a character he always does, and Stiller basically the same. I would say Ayoade and Hill brought something different, since at least with Ayoade he hasn’t really been in an American film yet, and Hill got to play a pretty psychotic military character.

So sure, a bit disappointing, but thankfully it wasn’t complete trash.