Tag: Australian

Alvin’s Harmonious World of Opposites has a lot of things going for it right off the bat.

One: It has an amazing title. We immediately know who the main character is, and we know that there will be some fucked up shit in this movie.

Two: It is the first film I saw for WorldFest here in Houston, in an actual theater. I saw 16 of them before the festival started, but they were in chairs in my homes and at work and on my phone, not in theaters.

Three: The promo image for the movie (seen below) has a large assortment of pandas. So many goddamn pandas. Stuffed, cute, pandas. I actually have 5 stuffed panda toys in my house right now! I am not as obsessed as this main character, but I can certainly, and will happily, relate.

Squeeeeeeeeeee!

Alvin (Teik Kim Pok) is a bit agoraphobic, and he hasn’t left his small apartment in about 18 months. He talks with his friend (Nitin Vengurlekar) on Skype, his job is translating manuals into Japanese with a boss (Ailís Logan) who thinks he is at an office, and he orders everything online. His groceries, a shit ton of knickknacks, and of course panda themed items. He is a bit obsessed, but he doesn’t notice that of course.

Most of his face to face interaction is with his neighbor, Virginia (Vashti Hughes), a vile mouthed racist who blames everything on everyone else and cares not about her volume. Oh, and there is an attractive girl who lives below him, whom he has never talked to, but he has a peep hole in his floor into her bedroom. Erm.

Problem’s begin to really arise when Alvin finds some black substance leaking from the attic into his room. He has some neat freak tendencies, and it is entirely too gross, so he goes to check on it. And what he finds up in his attic he would have never guessed in a million, panda billion, years.

Also featuring Tina Andrews and Dessy Fitri.

If he doesn’t watch it, his foul mouthed neighbor might accidentally eat him.

Alvin’s blahblah is a short film, only about 70 minutes with a handful of characters. Mostly just Alvin and his neighbor, along with the weird lady who lives in her attic. In case you are not ready for the film, the first scenes quickly give us the neighbor on a “cunt” fueled rant to wake up the viewer.

Personally, my favorite scenes were just Alvin hanging out in his Apartment, working, living his life. As advertised, the attic magical “adventure” that he went on was sure, yeah, quite weird. It had gibberish language and a lot of silence. It was bizarre and a complete tonal shift from the rest of the film.

With some thought, you can sort of figure out the purpose of his trip and what it means for his character, it is certainly not given to you on a platter. At the same time, I have no reason to suspect my own interpretation of events are correct at all, and I can easily be reading it wrong.

If this movie was entirely about a man who had slowly turned into a hoarder who never left his small room, I probably would have enjoyed it more. The attic makes the entire thing unique and stand out, but it is just so extreme. It was still quite well done given the subject matter and time.

The Dressmaker is about someone who makes dresses.

Review done!

Oh, and it is from Australia! How exotic.

So god damn exotic up in this introduction.

Okay, okay, here are some more details. This takes place in a small outback town of Dungatar, a close knit, everyone knows everyone community. And Tilly (Kate Winslet) has returned to take care of her sick mother (Judy Davis). Tilly was sent out of the town at a young age, to live elsewhere. She became a really great maker of dresses and is ready to return to her roots.

But then she is called a murderer. What? Apparently she was banished for killing another kid at the local school house. The local head councillor (Shane Bourne) and father of the dead boy made the decision. But now that she is back, her home is in shambles and they call her mother mad. She doesn’t remember the circumstances around the boys death, but deems she needs to find out the truth.

What follows is romance, lies, outright bitchiness, competition, and more. Hell, once she starts getting people to accept her again, some higher ups go and bring in a rival dress maker (Sacha Horler) to stop her spread of good will

But even if Tilly finds out the truth of her past, will it make things better? Or is the town too spiteful and angry for there to ever really be a cure.

Also featuring Liam Hemsworth, Hugo Weaving, Julia Blake, Kerry Fox, and Rebecca Gibney.

The cop can’t arrest her for standing out in a crowd. Nor for looking fabulous.

The Dressmaker is not for the feint of heart. Wait, no, it is relatively mild. That’s not right. The Dressmaker is full of romance and wonder! Shit, that is wrong too.

Oh here it goes. The Dressmaker is a weird, quirky film. It is about small town life, but you know, Australian. And set in the 1950s or so. Those who grew up in small towns will be able to more readily relate to the gossipy nature of everything, regardless of country it is set in. It isn’t a completely unique element in film, but given that this movie deals with an old murder involving kids, it does sort of grow quite rampantly.

But really, the reason to watch this film would probably just be the dresses themselves. They are extravagant by any means, but look bizarre when compared to the dusty, small town, 1950s vibe. Just another quirky element of the movie, the juxtaposition of the fancy dresses with the poor farmer. They are quite wonderful and this film has potential, if any, to be nominated for costumes.

But outside of the dresses and some fun Winslet movies, it didn’t really offer me much more. The ending started to get carried away with itself, as everything suddenly happened much more quickly than the earlier pace of the film. Some crazy things happen, they keep happening, and then Winslet’s character goes out with a bang.

A bit of revenge, a bit of mystery, a lot of weird, and a movie that is forever going to be hard to recommend.

Kill me once, kill me twice, kill me deadly, as Lita Ford kind of almost once said.

Ms Ford couldn’t count to three, much like Valve, but it is for good reason. Kill Me Three Times? That is definitely excessive. Two is usually excessive as well, unless you believe in resurrection, but most cultures don’t have double resurrection as far as I can tell.

Now, this could be some strange Beetlejuice situation, where the only way to die is killing the entity three times. Maybe the person in question is a third cat and two thirds human (how to genetics work?), so they only were given 3 lives instead of 9.

Actually, yes, that is my official answer going into this movie. A movie that must be about a man who is one-third cat. And no, I hope it isn’t anything like Catwoman.

Although wearing all black and having a sexually awakened pose does give me pause.

In the Australian action thriller comedy (?) we’ve all been waiting for, we get to see Simon Pegg play a hit man! Sure, Charlie Wolfe is a bit eccentric, with a mustache and all. And maybe he doesn’t take out his targets in one well placed sniper kill. But you know, he eventually gets the job done! And right after getting the job done, he gets a call to do another job! Ha ha! Life is good, plenty of work, people to kill.

It is simple, Jack Taylor (Callan Mulvey) wants his wife, Alice (Alice Braga), killed and he wants Charlie to do it. A nice lump of sum for the job too. He wants her dead for the reason anyone would, getting cheated on. She cheated on him with a MECHANIC, Dylan (Luke Hemsworth), which makes sense, given that he is the third (and oldest) Hemsworth.

However, the issue is that Charlie wasn’t the only one who was hired to kill Alice! Enter mild mannered dentist, Natahn Webb (Sullivan Stapleton). He has a bit of a gambling addiction and owes some powerful people a lot of money. His wife and receptionist Lucy (Teresa Palmer) is going to help him out, and they are going to be awkward about it.

Also featuring Steve Le Marquand and Bryan Brown. And other shenanigans and twists occur of course, but if I told you them, you’d have no reason to watch the movie.

Like, omg, how did that knife get in his hand?!

Kill Me Three Times was actually a bit harder of a film to describe for two reasons. One, the story isn’t told in standard chronological order. It jumps around a bit. Why? Just to see things in different points of view, and get some flash backs. That is why. It could be fine, but in this case it didn’t enhance the movie at all.

Two, the movie was boring as fuck. I am so disappointed by how uninterested the film went as it dragged along. This element of course made the scenes where we were able to see events again from a different point of view even more dull. I was bored the first time they showed it to me, now I get to be bored from a new angle!

I don’t remember laughing at all. I thought some scenes may have been amusing, but no outright guffaws bellowed from my diaphragm. Was it a bit dark? Sure. And there was technically a little bit of action to make it interesting.

Pegg wasn’t terrible, but his character also felt underutilized. There was a bit too much advertising his character for how much of the movie was about all the other characters as well, if you know what I mean.

Overall, I would describe Kill Me Three Times as a bad cluster fuck. A movie that wanted to be a Tarantino film and dropped the mark a few yards before a first down.

Despite Halloween being a thing weeks ago, horror movies are still coming out and existing. I gave horror movies a whole week! What gives?

Apparently I have to see horror movies outside of October too, which is dumb. Wouldn’t it be nice if every month had a genre theme? December would be my favorite month, because it clearly would belong to Musicals. June would be animated musicals.

That is all nonsense. I am now going to talk about The Babadook, an indie movie outside of Australia with a budget that all went towards making the creature. That’s right, it’s a creature movie.

And a movie involving books. How scary!

This is a simple story about a mother and her child. You see, Amelia (Essie Davis) is a single mother, because en route to the hospital to give birth they got into a car accident and the husband didn’t make it. Kind of a bad thing to happen on a day of life.

So life has been rough. She works at a nursing home, which pays enough for them to get by, although they aren’t rolling in the dough. And her son, Samuel (Noah Wiseman), he is a weird one. My guess is some sort of autism, but they never really say anything. He is definitely a loner, likes to yell, has behavioral problems in school. He pretends he sees monsters and wants to fight them, so he builds crude imaginative weapons to fight the invisible ghouls.

Well, Amelia likes to read to her son before bed. And today he wants to hear “Mister Babadook,” a pop-up book she doesn’t remember getting for him. Well, it is really odd and eerie, talking of a boogie man that once you know of its existence, will never lead, and it freaks the boy out.

And guess what the book unleashes. Guess. Come on. Guess. You probably couldn’t even tell.

Also with Barbara West and Daniel Henshall. They are important to the story. I guess.

Yeah, this picture alone just looks like autism to me.

This is not your typical current horror movie. It doesn’t really feature jump scares, it features a unique new creature, and it is pretty frightening at times. Aka, what you want in a horror movie!

Many different aspects of this film are unsettling, including just how Amelia/Samuel look throughout the film. Clearly the kid is creepy, with those big popping eyes and pale skin. The mom does a great job too, always slightly disheveled, conveying the emotions of someone who just can’t take it anymore. Someone who thinks they are literally going insane.

It was eerie and great. And hell, The Babadook didn’t even look that silly. It had a clear lower budget feel to it, but based on the animated from the books, from the boogieman stories and from nightmares in general, the style really worked for me. Even the creepy noises and voice he made seemed great.

The Babadook is on video on demand, and you most likely won’t see it in theaters anytime soon. But if you want a relatively unique and decent horror, this is one of the better recent ones to check. The theaters/Hollywood have been failing us over October, so this might be your best bet.

If I named a movie The Rover, I would make it about an alien dog. One who knew how to speak and chose to live on the human world in disguise to learn and scout for his home evil dog planet. That seems like an aptly named movie title in my mind.

But instead we get one about a guy who wanders, who roves. And it is a subtle dystopian film?

And it is Australian?

Fine. You got me. I will give it a shot.

Hah. Looks like he will give it a shot too. Right? Right?

Set in Australia, this takes place ten years after a large economic collapse of the world that has changed a few things. That’s right, lawlessness won out not after nuclear war or global warming, but the fall of the economy. A whole bunch of different people moved to Australia to get away from it all, bringing more culture and more weirdos.

Three criminals are on the run after a robbery goes wrong. Henry (Scoot McNairy) and his two friends (Tawanda Manyimo, David Field) are arguing over something that went wrong and get into an accident because of it.

They need new wheels and stat, so they hot wire a car and skedaddle. But that car belonged to Eric Rover (Guy Pearce), who doesn’t actually have that last name. That’s a joke. They don’t tell us his last name (so I guess it could be Rover?). Eric really likes his car so he chases them down, they knock him out, and he is fucked. He really wants his car…

So he does whatever he can to find it damn it. And when he finds Henry’s brother, Rey (Robert Pattinson), all bloodied and angry, he uses the kid to find out Henry’s whereabouts. You know. To find his car.

One day I hope I can look so grizzled yet charming.

The Rover, despite its subtle nature, is in your face with its dark nature and completely unforgiving. By far more drama than action, it focuses on the mysterious characters and is vague on details on purpose.

Gritty in many ways, as a lot of these people are ruthless. People die without a second thought. The economic collapse did a lot to people. People lost their livelihoods, maybe their families, their jobs, their purpose for existing. Hard to not turn to crime, especially when no police force.

I liked the world that was built in the film. It was a unique way of looking at a world gone mad while also keeping it simple (stupid).

Guy Pearce is an interesting individual. He picks usually such unique and interesting roles, and for the most part, knocks it out of the park. He was the best part of Lockout and he was so good in this as well. This might be the best acting Robert Pattinson has done, but I still really liked him in Water For Elephants.

I think the most important aspect of The Rover is that it feels entirely unique without going to such grandiose scales to present itself. Despite it being pretty good, it is also a movie I can’t see watching too many more times in my life or even buying. So that is probably a notable factor.

The Hunter came out almost a year ago, last July. I am pretty sure I got it sometime around then too. Whoops. One of those random gains that you forget about for apparently 10 or so months.

Let’s make this a metaphor about life. I just won’t explain that metaphor, to complete this very bad intro to a review.

Hopefully shitty enough to cause a bar fight. Or sexy enough. Shit, what causes bar fights again?

Red Leaf is a military biotech company. Yeah, didn’t you know that those were a thing? Because they totally are! Military. Biotech. Some sort of crazy weapon based thing. Well, they have reports that the Tasmanian Tiger has been spotted recently in Tasmania. Makes sense. Unless you realize that that they have been extinct since 1963! Oh hooray, a breakthrough for the species! Maybe they can breed them back to a populated state!

Wait. Hmm. Red Leaf isn’t a fan of that. In fact, they hire The Hunter (Willem Dafoe) to head to Tasmania, capture the tiger, extract its DNA and kill any other tigers he is able to find. Holy shit, that’s the opposite of saving them! It turns out they might have some paralyzing venom in their bite, and they want to weaponize the fuck out of it, charming. They also want no one else to get a hold of it. Evil!

He heads to Tasmania, pretending to be a Biology researcher, and stays at a local cabin. Lucy (Frances O’Connor) is drugged up on pain meds, despite having two children. Her husband died, he was a wildlife protection guy. Hah.

Either way, The Hunter goes into the wild 12 days at a time, setting traps, looking for the Tiger and then returns to the cabin. He begins to like the kids, fix their home life, and even the mom. They almost make a quaint little family. At the same time he has to deal with local battles between the environmentalists and the loggers, who get violent over each other.

Will the Hunter find the tiger and carry out the deed? Or will he give in to the pressures of other groups. After all, if he refuses, they will probably just keep sending people to do the job until it gets done. Sam Neill is also in this movie as random helpful neighbor guy/guide.

Ah, they got a picture of everyone who saw The Hunter on opening night.

The cool thing about The Hunter is that if you watch it, you are treated to some kick ass Tasmanian scenery. It is filmed entirely in the country, so it gives it some layers of authenticity. There are also people there who claim to see the Tigers, but have no real substantial proof, so it is based on local legends. If you like Willem Dafoe, you get a lot of him in the movie. Not shirtless or anything. Just it is mostly him being a bad ass (or pseudo badass).

However, the movie does move pretty slow. On top of that, even though the ending was unexpected, I didn’t like what it gave me. It all seemed completely out of left field, and probably not the best course of action to end it. They had the balls to end it that way, but I didn’t find the character change to be believable.

You know what that means? Average! Hooray. I’m bored.

Again, with the random Redbox rentals, I usually try to find something that might give me a good review. Shitty movies can lead to great reviews, so picking things I’ve never heard of can be amazing. That is what happened with 1313 Cougar Cult. But with The Loved Ones, it looked like a random prom based horror. Could be hilarious accidentally. Not to mention it is foreign. Australia? Heck yes.

I mean, she is cute I guess. Kind of creepy with the power tool.

Prom is a wonderful time for everyone, except maybe those who don’t get dates. Take Lola (Robin McLeavy), she is a nice girl, but a bit lonely. She tries to ask out Brent (Xavier Samuel), but he turns her down. Not for any malicious reason, but because he has a girlfriend Holly (Victoria Thaine). Makes sense, no harm no fowl.

Well, unless you are Lola. She isn’t a fan of that. When Brent is on a self hike in Australia, he finds himself knocked out, and yes, awakening in a house, tied to a chair. Oh joy! Oh hey, he is in a tuxedo now, and Lola is there, in a dress. What in the hell?

Looks like he is indeed going to prom with Lola, and her crazy family, but prom is now going to be inside. Her dad (John Brumpton) is there to help with the festivities, and grandma to be all weirdly lobotomized and awkward. Can Brent escape from the date from hell, before he get tortured to death in this hell house?

It is important to note that not everyone has a bad prom night. His good friend Jamie (Richard Wilson) asks out a hot goth chick Mia (Jessica McNamee) and has the time of his life. She has a missing brother too. Interesting indeed.

This is what you get for not cheating on your long term serious girlfriend.

I know what you are thinking. This film is stupid. Well, thankfully I am here to tell you that it is much better than the plot makes it see.

It is kind of a torture porn, featuring one guy, but some serious fucked shit ends up happening, including that power drill, and a few attempts at escape. But really it is an interesting and kind of unique stuff happens. The ending basically blew my mind, when the secrets of the family and her past issues came to fruition.

But it is also easy to feel uncomfortable during this movie. Lot of screaming, and slow pain. The best pain? Not sure.

I wouldn’t call this a scary horror, jut uncomfortable. But there are also some comedic elements thrown in to break the tension at important points. I will put this under the win column for random foreign Red Box films.