Tag: Alec Baldwin

Holidays are now in full swing and the makers of movies are finally tired of the same old crap. Do we really need another movie about Santa or the Spirit of Christmas? Or trying to explain why a bunny celebrates with eggs? How the tooth fairy is able to gather teeth all around the world? No, the consumer is tired of all of that. We need new tales, new ideas, but preferably with characters we already know. Which is probably why Rise of the Guardians will be such a success!

Yeah, I kind of like the Tooth Fairy in this film. I would do things, horrible things.

The Guardians are a team of holiday figures and legends who have banded together to protect the children of the world! Formed by the mysterious man on the moon, it consists of North (Alec Baldwin) aka Santa Claus, Bunny (Hugh Jackman) for Easter, the Tooth Fairy (Isla Fisher) and the Sandman (who doesn’t talk).

They haven’t had any problems the last 900 or so years, with the last threat being a man named Pitch Black (Jude Law), aka the Boogeyman. But they banished him so long ago, he can’t cause any problems. After all, you aren’t even visible to humans unless they believe in you. He still has some scary powers, just harder for him to cause wide scale havoc.

Unfortunately, those last 900 years he has been in hiding, planning to take out the guardians by making the kids of the world stop believing in them, Yes, no more happiness, only fear! Mwhaha! But then there is Jack Frost (Chris Pine), forever trapped a teenager in his weird life. No one has ever really believed in him, so he is used to being ignored. Despite that, he still tried to bring fun and excitement to the world, one snowball at a time.

Adding a new entity to the battle is not what The Boogeyman had planned for, but can some snow and ice really stop the eternal darkness? To me, personally, it seems like it would help bring upon eternal darkness. Yes, I am saying snow is dumb.

Pitch Black has a very Hades vibe going on, but darker. Probably because no fire on his head.

As I have stated before in many reviews (Tooth Fairy, Hop) I can’t stand when they make a movie about holiday figures, but don’t make it work in the world they created for the film. That is, why would adults no longer believe in the Easter Bunny, if he is really the entity out painting eggs and hiding them around yards? If the parents aren’t doing it, then clearly it is something else. No reason for them to not believe in it, when there is plenty of evidence that they actually exist.

Besides that, there are some other plot holes. For some reason, the guardians lose their powers if kids don’t believe in them. Why? Not sure, since clearly Jack Frost and Pitch Black have not had problems in the power department, despite the clear lack of belief. Arbitrary penalties for nonsensical rules.

Outside of the large plot holes, I found the movie on its own to be pleasant. The animation was almost mouth watering. I loved the attention to detail on the characters and the large fight scenes between Jack Frost, Pitch Black, and The Sandman. I think all the actors did well voicing their respective characters, especially Baldwin as a sort of Russian, extreme Santa Claus.

Oh, and yetis. There are yetis in this movie. Yetis can single-handedly save a bad movie if utilized properly (The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor). I am sure they will be selling stuffed versions for Christmas, so I will put it on my wishlist.

Rise has great visuals and a decent storyline, as long as you ignore the prevalent plot holes. If anything, I can say it is entertaining and a movie families will definitely enjoy.

Before you get all pumped up, no Suburban Girl is not some crazy return of Sarah Michelle Gellar.

She is still stuck doing weird shows. Because this movie came out in 2007, and thus is now super old. But then again, if Jennifer Love Hewitt can make a come back through shows, why not SMG?!

Well, not if she tries to do it through her crazy eyes.

Brett (Gellar) is a new york book editor! What a job! Except she has no confidence in her job, doesn’t work for the best firm, and her boss/mentor just got fired and replaced by Faye Falkner (Vanessa Branch), a super lame boss. She makes her do weird things. And she just wants to be a big time editor, not an associate. But you know, she edits in pencil. Who does that?!

She eventually meets Archie Knox (Alec Baldwin) a famous editor, who everyone loves, and is totally single. He is a bit older too. Just a little bit. He knew her aunt, who used to be an editor too. Either way, she kind of likes him a lot, and breaks up with her boyfriend because he is immature (Chris Carmack).

At the same time, her relationship with her father (James Naughton) is a weird one. She goes to him for advice a lot, and generally he stays out of her affairs. Turns out he also has cancer, and she was the last to know after her brother (Ebon Moss-Bachrach) because they figured she couldn’t handle it.

Either way, the story is about how SMG might gain confidence, by sexing up someone way older, who totally patronizes her while teaching at the same time. Totally worth it right. Maybe its real love. Maybe he is just an alcohol.

Could be both, from this picture.

Real talk time. This film was a bore. Didn’t really laugh. Didn’t really care. I enjoyed one scene, ONE SCENE. Where Baldwin and Gellar were fighting early on, and he corrected her grammar in the middle of it. Editor fights. Good stuff. But that was it. Baldwin felt a bit boring, Gellar wasn’t too relatable to me, and everyone else really didn’t matter.

Lots of book talk. Lots of skippable moments.

Rock Of Ages is probably going to be another biased review. I’ve had the soundtrack for the musical for probably a couple years now. Wanted to see it since I first heard about it and love the soundtrack. Lots of mixes between songs, and interesting ways to do them. So when I heard about the movie version, I knew I had to see it as well.

So finally, months later, I got a chance to, hooray! Time to rawwwk!

I said rawk, damn it. Not stand their and look solemn.

This story is mainly about a small town girl and a city boy. Drew Boley (Diego Boneta) is working as a bar aid at the famous The Bourbon, a concert hall / bar in LA. A city some may say was built on rock and roll. Sherrie Christian (Julianne Hough) had just arrived from Oklahoma and looking to be a famous singer! She of course gets mugged right away, and Drew kind of saves her. But not really. They immediately hit it off, and Drew gets her a job as a waitress at the Bourbon, despite the owner, Dennis Dupree’s (Alec Baldwin), negative reaction to it. But thankfully Lonny (Russel Brand), the second in command and MC seems pretty cool with it all.

A new mayor is getting elected in LA, Mike Whitmore (Bryan Cranston) who’s wife, Patricia (Catherine Zeta-Jones) is going to help clean up the streets. Using good christian values, and the best way to do that is to get rid of rock and roll! The center of it all, The Bourbon. Who also happen to be having tax problems.

But no worries, Arsenal, the kickest ass band ever, who played their first gig at The Bourbon is coming the next night to play their final gig, before frontman Stacee Jaxx (Tom Cruise) starts his solo career. Big money time! And Drew is going to get to open for them! Oh man! Everything is going wonderful!

Until it doesn’t. Sexy stuff happens, miss-communications, Stacee is a crazy ass person, and love dies. The dream dies. The Christians win? With Malin Akerman as Rolling Stones reporter trying to find the real Stacee Jaxx, Mary J. Blige as a strip club owner, Paul Giamatti as scumbag manager, and Will Forte as local news reporter, will they eventually be able to save The Bourbon from being demolished? Will they ever stop believing?

Will they actually hit them with their best shot?

It should be noted that this musical, although the characters don’t know they are in a musical (like some of them do in Broadway) definitely makes fun of itself, and isn’t going for a serious thing. They just want nothing but a good time. And I belive they definitely deliver. The music is fun and catchy, lots of great songs and mash ups, and yet it is incredibly different from the broadway version.

I’m not negatively comparing, just noting, they have entirely different plots, and only the same main main characters. This lead to awesome moments, like the church dance scene for Hit Me With Your Best shot. Unfortuantely that was my second favorite song on the original soundtrack, as it had a german guy singing it, and it sounded amazing. Similarly, my favorite song was a mash up of Heaven / More Than Words / To Be With You, but in the movie they took out the Mr. Big parts, so no mash ups were ever 3+ songs.

They also in general had to cut out a lot of songs, and added new one ins, but kept some of the jokes. I mean, making the girl named Sherrie still, but cutting out Oh Sherrie? That’s just cruel.

But besides that, the movie felt pretty awesome. Some problems include Sherrie doing pretty much the same thing in every song it felt like (walking down the street belting lyrics. every damn time) and once they introduce Mary J. Blige she was also pretty much a part of every song after that, despite barely making sense.

But hey. The REO Speedwagon duet between Baldwin and Brand is reason alone to see this musical.

I can say that I honestly only watched Lymelife because I saw Alec Baldwin on the cover. Of course he was wearing a suit too.

Because that is all Alec Baldwin has to do nowadays.

Well its a suit of clothing at least, right?

This movie is more about a little rich~ kid named Scott (Rory Culkin). They used to live in Queens, but have moved out to Long Island, and are kind of big on real estate. Also this is the 70s.

Apparently Lyme disease may have just started recently, or it doesn’t have a real cure or something. Can mess you up for years. One of their neighbors (Timothy Hutton) got a deer tick while hunting two years ago, and has never been the same. Kind of sick a lot. His wife (Cynthia Nixon) has to bring home the bacon on her own, and makes it all kind of weird on their daughter (Emma Roberts).

Scott kind of has a thing for her too, but she is way more popular than him. Speaking of having a thing for people, Scott’s dad (Baldwin) is having an affair with her mom. Yay! The mom doesn’t enjoy being married to a sick guy. Scott’s mom (Jill Hennessy) knows something is up, but she just seems crazy to Scott. It isn’t until Scott’s brother returns temporarily from the army (Kieran Culkin. Yes real life younger brothers to Macaulay) for her birthday does Scott realize the truth about his father.

This causes a lot of family strife amongst both groups. Even more bad things happen when they find out Mr. “I am diseased” father hasn’t been going to his job interviews, mostly enjoying the whole “stay at home and do nothing aspect” of his life. Doesn’t mean he takes kindly to cheating. Factoring in all of the parents issues makes Scotts little crush seem insignificant. Doesn’t mean he was going to stop crushing, just puts it in perspective for him.

The end of the movie is full of betrayal, families rekindling and others splitting, new love, and maybe a gunshot or two.

See them bundled? It’s because they don’t want ticks. And its cold. And they might have just had sex.

I should have told the plot in a more straightforward way. My bad. But this movie was pretty intense.

The last five minutes I was scared. A lot of comparisons are made in regards to this movie and American Beauty, but they are pretty different. I guess they kind of both talk about the American Dream and sex with a neighbor (kind of neighbor). But one is a mid life crisis, and the other is a teenage boy. Who’s dad may be going through a midlife crisis. Either way, affairs are bad, and having people with guns mad at you is bad. So in those last five minutes when I was scared, it still wasn’t that predictable.

And most importantly, I wasn’t left without an answer. The plot lines were all finished. I wouldn’t say in a nice neat little package, because of some of the implications afterwards, but definitely felt like a full movie which was good.

I thought a lot of the acting was great, especially from Hutton, Baldwin, and Nixon. Rory would later want to bang Emma in Scream 4, because all of those people are in the same movies for some reason.

Hmm. This is a movie I really wanted to like. Who doesn’t like Alec Baldwin, I mean, come on!

The story is the one as old as time…a divorced couple of about 10 years want to have an affair with each other. Lots and lots of old people sex. “Old people” being of course kind of a ridiculous concept here. In fact, you may even describe their relationship as…. Complicated! It was an interesting smorgasbord of actors/actresses who played their children (/children in law) including Jim from the Office and the Silas from Weeds.

Steve Martin also being the sort of antagonist was weird as well. He has always been a “jerk” but never in this light.

Only joke here is the pun on name for a soda fountain operator. Get it? Get it? Fuck you.

The best performances are of course from Baldwin and Streep, who are very convincing at their portrayals. They are great at these roles. Unfortunately just having well done acting is not the end all be all of a movie. It also has to be a bit more interesting. It is weird that when Streep is freaking out that she is sexing up Baldwin, she calls it an affair. She isn’t cheating on anyone, but Alec is. I guess she has a higher moral ground than myself.