Tag: Miley Cyrus

I can’t say I planned on watching LOL today. But I left my movie at home, whoops. Had to go to the backup! And it fit my time schedule, so LOL it was.

What is LOL? It is an acronym, short for something, can’t figure it out.

I am sure it is something made up by Little Old Ladies though.

Still writing in a diary? That is pretty much a modern Lowest Of the Low

Guess what? Lola (Miley Cyrus) is our main hero! But when people are too busy and can’t be wasted with two syllable names, they just shorten it to Lol. Gotcha. She is just your normal teen age girl, a senior, doing some stuff with boys, having divorced parents, and not the best relationships with either of them. Not even her mother (Demi Moore) who she lives with. And the mom just wants the best, but blah blah blah.

She is totally Locked On Lovebeams with her serious long term boyfriend Chad (George Finn), too. You know, until she finds out he cheated on her. WITH ASHLEY (Ashley Greene) EVEN. THE FUCK CHAD, WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? Ah, because Lola ain’t given it up. Her Land O’ Lakes is off limits.

So she is mad, takes it out on people. But thankfully she has BFFs in Emily (Ashley Hinshaw) and Kyle (Douglas Booth). But having just a guy friend is probably not doable. I wouldn’t be surprised if Chad was actually Looking Or Lusting Over Lola Our Lady. (Was that too much? My bad).

And pretty much that is it. Some awkward love. Maybe a trip to Paris. The mom trying to get a date as well. Maybe some sex and secret journals in the last twenty minutes, that get resolved in like, three minutes and then the movie suddenly stops.

Sure is a Lot Of Love going on in Paris. Maybe too much.

So uhh, yeah.

Rocking out at over 90 minutes, this movie has about 20 minutes of plot. Maybe. MAYBE.

It is poorly spliced together at the beginning (Awkward audio cut scenes in my opinion, and poor transitions). And the plot offers absolutely nothing.

Girl is cheated on. Some people have sex. Girl eventually has sex too with her old BFF now just BF. Mom finds out, flips out for 30s and then doesn’t and then done. What in the fuck? Seriously, what?

Absolutely nothing of value or interest happens this movie. One of its selling points is all “Oh man in this modern world, we share everything on Facebook and shit, and no longer are secrets secretive”. But technology, and texting barely matters in this movie. Just the fact the her mom accidentally read her journal. Yep.

Fuck all this noise.

Hey look, a movie based off a Nicholas Sparks novel that was made a whole year before the movie. Are all of his books just turning into instant movie bait?

Probably. What I also learned about The Last Song is that apparently NC was supposed to host the filming crew, but voters turned it down, so they went to the magical land of Georgia.

Those lawyers must be magical to convince the citizens to provide those kind of tax breaks!

The story stars angsty teen Miley Cyrus and her younger brother, having to atrocious task of living with their dad for the summer in Georgia. Years earlier their parents got divorced. Her dad, Greg Kinnear, used to be a Juliard piano teacher and taught Miley all she knows. She even got accepted to Juliard, but hates her dad over the divorce and refuses to go next year. The brother however was by far my favorite part of the movie. I think he is supposed to be around 10, but he had some of the best lines as he is way smarter than any kid should be.

There is also a love interest in Georgia, played by some nobody Liam Hemsworth. It is ludicrous for him trying to woo Miley. Her character is way too annoying / moody towards him, always going off and on. No way is she that “unique” for him to do that. Probably just trying to get back at his rich parents.

Spoilers? Doubtful. The story is of course how the dad has some late stages of Cancer and actually wanted to spend some time with the kids before he gets all sick and dies. So the story is of course Miley learning of this, and dealing with it, trying to reconnect with the father she grew to hate and also learn to love the piano again.

The story is pretty much expected. The ending goes as expected as well. Everything falls into their neatly packaged pieces. Sure it is kind of sad, but Miley is not a great actress yet. She kept making faces that were supposed to be sad? But just seemed to look goofy.

“Oh, she’s just bein Miley.“

Despite the absolutely nothing new aspects of it, it was still overall okay. Lets say because the little brother kicked some ass.