Tag: Judi Dench

Belfast

Belfast, not just a city in Northern Ireland anymore.

Well, it still is a city in Northern Ireland, and I am sure it is the name of cities in other places too. But now it is also a movie.

And what would a movie about Ireland be about? Certainly not the making and maiden voyage of the Titanic ship, nah, that is too boring. We need to talk about some of that Catholic/Protestant fighting that happened throughout the 1900’s. That way we can get car bombs and actual religious persecution.

family
And of course loving happy times with families. Of course!

In 1969, man walked on the moon, and there was unrest in Northern Ireland. Although Catholics and Protestants had been living together mostly fine over the last few decades (After some 1920’s stuff), it looks like anger is back on the menu. Citizens of Northern Ireland want to expel those Catholics from their country, back to the other Ireland, where they are mostly at already. And they are willing to expel them by force, and go to war with their own government, being mad about a whole lot of issues. We get street riots, car bombs, death, and of course vandalism.

Buddy (Jude Hill) is just a kid during all of this, and the violence is quite scary. He knows that the Catholic families are a little bit different from their religion, but not enough for him to care. He wants to marry a girl at his school, he wants to get better at school work just to be close to her, he wants to hang out with his grandparents (Judi Dench, Ciarán Hinds), and his cousins, and all of that. He definitely doesn’t want to be a bad kid.

But he is unsupervised a lot. His daddy (Jamie Dornan) had to find work in London, so he is back for a weekend every two weeks, to pay for survival and missing back taxes. His mom (Caitriona Balfe) is struggling to keep them all together in an unsafe city, but it is the only city she knows so she does not want to leave it.

This is getting harder and harder with the increase in violence, decrease in morals, and even a leader of the local gang wants payment from the family, or their dad to join them in patrols, or else they might be targeted. Damn.

Life in Belfast kind of sucks in 1969.

Also starring Colin Morgan, Lara McDonnell, and Lewis McAskie.

movie
I am always going to be a fan of people going to the movies in a movie.

I went into Belfast film knowing nothing about it. The poster I saw, a kid training to be a gladiator, and jumping over a lot of heads, in black and white. So I figured it would mostly be in black and white, which was certainly correct. But definitely not training to be a gladiator, that just references the first scene of the film.

I honestly think the choice to film it as a black and white film with the occasional splashes of color was a mistake. I think the film was shot gorgeously, with a lot of unconventional shots during regular conversations, or shots framed through literal windows and doorways, and more. It was all very pleasant to look at, but the unnecessary “old timey” feel didn’t contribute to the film for me. If the occasional splashes of color felt more apparent, I probably would have cared less, but overall, its an artistic choice I can’t fully get behind here.

I think all of the actors did a lovely job, especially shout outs to the parents/grandparents of the film. They felt like a family going through a rough time. The advice felt real. The conversations felt real. The love felt real. I especially liked the chemistry between Dornan and Balfe. I was on the edge of my seat wondering what would happen to their relationship, and the only part I teared up at was during the “Everlasting Love” scene. It was powerful and gave me hope.

I am a bit surprised that the movie takes place during a period where civil unrest was rekindling across the religious communities, the start of decades of domestic terrorism.  You know, since I went in blind. However, even though it started out as the plot, it really featured very little violence and terrorism. It is mostly the first scene, and a scene much closer to the ending where there are rioters out and looting. Most of it is just a regular family trying to get by. It places a huge importance on that specific street, which does confuse me a little bit. Was it really just the one main street with conflict and barricades and an army hanging out? At least camera wise, that is what I am overall led to believe.

Belfast is a strong movie and a sad movie about living in unruly times. But really it is about a family who has no idea what to do to protect their own. Whether it means to stay and fix their community that they know, or to leave and run to safety elsewhere that is unknown.

3 out of 4.

Cats

Cats.

I was looking forward to Cats! When the trailer dropped, I was giddy with how ridiculous it looked. People bad mouthed the CGI designs, which I can see, but I figured I’d get used to it.

I love musicals, so I was excited to see a new musical on the screen, especially from an established property. I knew very little about it, except some cat names, and the song Memories.

But most importantly, I saw the movie Six Degrees of Separation, based on a play of the same name, with Will Smith in one of his first film roles. Why are they related? Because there is a long discussion about the musical cats being made into a movie, how it could not be done, and with Ian McKellen‘s character trying to get a role in the film.

It took 26 years, but he finally got that role!

TS
Cat Boobs

Alright, so in this movie about cats, there is kind of a plot?

It takes place in the alley’s of London, where every year, these cats gather together and do a singing competition, where one of the cats is chosen one! The chosen cat gets to arise into the heavens and be reborn. There is a lot they could do about that plot if they wanted to, like questioning motives and stuff. Maybe something like Logan’s Run!

But they don’t, we and they accept all of this. We get to be told their story, because a new cat, Victoria (Francesca Hayward) gets thrown into their ally from a bag, abandoned on the same night of their festival. So we get some narrator cat Munkustrap (Robbie Fairchild) to take her under the wing and introduce people.

These cats are all about their names and having a purpose in their lives. There is a cat for a very specific focus, and I guess that is it. Only some cats want to be reborn though, and for what reason is mostly unclear.

Anyways, a lot of cats get together to sing about themselves, and one cat, Macavity (Idris Elba) is a bad guy cat who wants to eliminate the competition so only he remains.

Starring a lot of weirdly named cats. Like Danny Collins, Naoimh Morgan, Mette Towley, Laurie Davidson, Jennifer Hudson, Jason Derulo, Taylor Swift, Judi Dench, Ian McKellen, Rebel Wilson, James Corden, Ray Winstone, and Steven McRae.

Wilson
More Cat Boobs.
Assumption: I will get used to these CGI looks for the cats and maybe the trailers weren’t just super polished.

Reality: Oh my goodness, these CGI looking cats look terrible. Why did they not do cat costumes!?

Yes, it is really distracting/off putting. I can see a lot of work done on most of their faces, but the rest of them, neck down, just feel like poor animation for the most part. When they are doing elaborate dance numbers, taps, or flips…it does nothing for me. I don’t know if there are real people behind them doing that. They might be! They probably are! But it also feels like it could be completely animated and just a face, which makes it zero levels of impressive.

It makes sense that the main song people know is Memory. It is probably the only song in the entire musical that isn’t very repetitive and full of a cat’s name over and over. Wanna know which song is sung by Rum Tum Tugger? The one with his name a whole lot. Shit, Pokemon execs probably saw Cats and thought them saying their name a lot was a good idea and launched the biggest multi-media franchise of all time.

This is a movie that is just a lot of introductions, and eventually it ends. It is visually appalling to watch not amazing CGI cat bodies dancing in front of pretty bad CGI backgrounds.

And one final note, how many times do they sing Memory in the musical live version? I feel like it heard it three times, or maybe one of those times was extra long. It did not have an amazing impact on me at the end when I already heard the thing 40 minutes prior. Such a strange decision.

Easily one of the worst films of the year, and a shocking (because of my naivety and love of musicals) one at that.

0 out of 4.

Victoria & Abdul

OH yeah, I definitely heard about Victoria & Abdul.

I heard about it, and knew I definitely didn´t want to see it, ever.

What a generic sounding, feel good, Hallmark looking film. Actor names meant nothing, it looked so low effort.

But whoever is pulling the strings behind these things campaigned their dicks off. And it got nominated for Two Oscars. Will it win them? Doubtful. But it is nominated, and I am here to review it.

Boat
Yep, there is Victoria & Abdul!

In the late 1800´s, Queen Victoria (Judi Dench) was off, being the Queen of England, doing Queen things. Namely getting awards from sovereign nations, eating lots of food, and taking naps. She was old. Abdul Karim (Ali Fazal) was just a clerk in a prison in India. A regular, who gives a shit job. But Abdul was tall. And they needed tall people.

Why? Because the Queen was to receive a mohur, a special gold coin from India, which they totally owned and were kind of dicks about. And they needed real Indians to go, they wanted tall ones, and he fit the bill. Him and Mohammed (Adeel Akhtar) were sent to not look her in the eye, bow, walk backwards. Make a huge bit of fuss over a tiny coin and then head back to India with no change in their lives.

But Abdul looked her in the eyes. She might have thought he was cute. She made them stay, to present more things as servants. Then eventually her private footmen. And then, eventually, he became her teacher on all things Indian culture. A strange, unprecedented turn of events, one that surely was going to piss off a lot of old, rich, white people.

Also starring some white people: Eddie Izzard, Tim Pigott-Smith, Michael Gambon, Paul Higgins, Fenella Woolgar, and Olivia Williams.

Servants
Oh, what is this? Victoria & Abdul & Some Other Guy!

As expected, Victoria & Abdul is a very okay movie. Maybe even one of the okayiest films out there.

Dench does perfectly fine as an old queen, bored with her life, looking for something to fill her hole. Fazal, however, is a fresh change. He has a nice smile, a good laugh and just a really spunky look about him. Without him in this role, giving me something to smile about, it would have easily have been a 1 movie.

This whole thing could be a made up story and it would not change anything. Just because it is real does not mean it is worthy of being a film. The story is about a small part of two people´s lives, and one of them is super royal. A strange pairing, a cute history factoid, and that is about it.

This film will leave our collective conscious in a few years, and that is not really a shame. Just a forgettable, okay film.

2 out of 4.

The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

I have been actively stalling watching The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. It used to be so easy, all I had to do was say, “Oh sorry Cathy. I haven’t seen the first one yet, that would be improper!” Cathy isn’t a real person, but the point is real. I was golden.

And then I fucking did it. I watched The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. Part of me was feeling sentimental and I wanted to see Dev Patel since The Newsroom was over. And since Chappie disappointed, that was my easiest solution.

You may not remember, but both Chappie and TSBEMH came out to theaters on the exact same date, both featuring Patel. So logically, one would assume there is no way both of his movies on the same day would be a disappointment. Right?

Dance
At least the dancing is already better in this one than Chappie.

Since the last film, there are two major updates worth noting.

One, Sonny (Patel) is finally getting married to Sunaina (Tina Desai), yay!

Two, the hotel wants to expand! They want to make a second hotel, they just need investors. Muriel (Maggie Smith) is basically co-running the hotel at this point too, so she is involved with that. The main investor is going to send an undercover guest to see how the run their ship before bringing the cash, so they have to be on guard and make sure everything runs swell. What’s that? Two people randomly coming to stay out of nowhere (Richard Gere, Tamsin Greig). Gee, I wonder who could be the undercover person!

Back to the marriage plot, because Sonny is apparently a spastic piece of shit, he is way too over hyped to make the new guest feel amazing, to get the deal, that he ignores his wife and wedding preparations. Even worse, he lashes out on Kushal (Shazad Latif), who is back in town, because he thinks Kushal sucks and actually thinks he is trying to take his fiance away from him. Not that he does a damn thing about it but mope uncontrollably.

Ahem, we also have a bunch of returning people as well. We have Judi Dench, Bill Nighy, Celia Imrie, Ronald Pickup, and Diana Hardcastle. I could tell you their plots as well, but then you would be drowned in information and well, not everything should be explained.

Gere
Including Gere probably doubled the entire movie budget.

Now that I have the nifty stars on top of the review, you can already tell I am disappointed in this movie. Which is a shame, because I gave an average rating to the first film and definitely believed in my head that the second movie would do better. It was like an origins story for a superhero. A lot of times the second film can be better, because we don’t have to deal with the character before they are a hero, they can be a hero the whole film!

No instead we got a couple main plot lines that just were not good. As I already mentioned, I hated Sonny in this film. In the first, he was a stubborn, lovable, idiot. In this film, he is obsessed, jealous, and a fool. He almost does nothing right. I have to say almost, because by the end of the film he does a few right things, because is the type of film to end on a happy note, not one that will end in failure and defeat. It is obvious going into it.

However these plot lines are just so dull, outside of Sonny’s character ruining it. As for the other stars, none of their plots are compelling either. Someone cheating, someone deciding on who to love, someone who can’t remember scripts, and someone who wants to make sure he doesn’t accidentally hire an assassin. Okay, that last bit was a little bit amusing, but that was it.

TSBEMH was a completely forgettable movie. I hope they don’t make a third, and I hope Patel gets better movies soon.

1 out of 4.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

If I had a nickle for every time I decided to not yet watch The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, I’d probably have at least $1.50 by now. I remember seeing it in the movie rental store Family Video, back when rental stores existed where I live. I would walk by the B section, glance at it, and mumble “Not today.”

And then they announced the sequel. The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. I saw a trailer, not actually knowing what the first one was about. Then I realized I had to hurry and watch the first one by early March, or else I wouldn’t get to see the sequel in theaters!

And here we are in July. I can say not getting to see the sequel in theaters was apparently a perfectly acceptable decision!

Old People
Much like my stereotype of the characters in the film, I would get to it when I get to it, dagnabbit.

Sonny (Dev Patel) has an idea. He is going to take his inherited family hotel and turn it into a lush amazing retirement home for Americans and British people to come to, to die. He is the third son and no one expects anything of him. His mom (Lillete Dubey) just wants him to come home for an arranged marriage, and doesn’t want him to marry Sunaina (Tina Desai). Too bad. He has dreams.

And this group of old people are his guinea pigs. That sounds sadistic, but really the film is about these gentle people ready to die.

Like Jean (Penelope Wilton) and Douglas (Bill Nighy), who have lost most of their money due to investing in their offspring and need some cheap place to go. And Evelyn (Judi Dench) who needs to sell off her house to pay off debts left by her late husband and needs somewhere cheap to go. She also is our blogger and narrator! And Muriel (Maggie Smith), who actually hates India but needs somewhere cheap to go for hip replacement surgery.

The theme here being people who want to go someplace cheap and far away for reasons.

Unless you are Graham (Tom Wilkinson), who retired suddenly and went back to India where he grew up for secret reasons. And finally we have Madge (Celia Imrie) and Norman (Ronald Pickup), looking for love and youth. But not young love, don’t be creepy.

Ride Hard
This could be the most exciting falcon punch warm up.

The best part of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is that it went exactly as I expected and thus, my delay of watching the film seems justified. Sure, one could argue I forced the movie to be as good as my brain let it be, but I gave it as fair of a shake as I would give most films I know nothing about.

At times, the film was touching, at times I smiled a bit, but I didn’t find it to be great in either the drama or the comedy regards. Tom Wilkinson has the best plot, hands down, and some of the plots don’t feel like I should have even mentioned them in the plot details. But that would be harsh to ignore a couple of the main cast members. After Wilkinson, I enjoyed Patel’s story line and thought the Nighy/Wilton plot was unique enough. Everything else was closer to a miss than an barely hit for me.

If anything, this movie just has too much going on in it. There are eight residents of the hotel, only a couple that have overlapping plot points for their own journeys, AND the owner of the hotel with his own story. So much going on, crammed into two hours, and I couldn’t connect with all the characters. Having so many people makes it feel like they are shooting with a shotgun, hoping the spread would hit enough people to make enough people love the film.

I do think a sequel can be better though. We will have established characters, some with finished plot lines from the first film, so they are easier to understand allowing for even newer characters to take the spotlight. The movie finishes pretty damn average, but it does lay down enough foundation for better films down the line.

2 out of 4.

Philomena

Finally, Philomena. The last of the “Best Picture” nominated films from 2013. And I got to review it a whole few days before the Academy Awards. Woo~

So yeah, screw an intro, let’s just finally do it.

Port
Hehehehe. I said “do it.”

Philomena tells the true story of Philomena Lee (Judi Dench), an old English woman who is looking for her son. This isn’t just any old missing son story either.

When Philomena was a younger girl, without parents in Catholic School, she met a boy. That boy made her happy. And that boy made her pregnant.

Well, she had a baby outside of marriage, which wasn’t good living as an orphan in a Catholic school. The nuns agreed to help her out, assuming she worked 7 days a week to pay off the debt for four years, and had little contact with her son. Then, one day, her son was taken away without warning, adopted without her permission from another couple.

Now, fifty years later, she is finally branching out to let other people know. You see, she sinned before and felt terrible about it, not wanting to make light of her faults. Her daughter introduces her to Martin Sixsmith (Steve Coogan), who normally doesn’t do human interest stories, but decides to give this one a listen due to boring and confusing circumstances in his life.

Sophie Kennedy Clark plays young Philomena.

Nun
OH LOOK. IT’S ONE OF THOSE EVIL NUNS! GET HER! GET HER!

Well, shit, turns out the acting was great in this movie too. Mainly in the three people I tagged. I expected that from Coogan and Dench. But Sophie Kennedy Clark? Someone I barely know? Who didn’t have a lot of screen time as young Philomena? She knocked it out of the park, and the feels were quite high. Again, everyone gave me feels, but she just gave them unexpectedly.

The story itself was a powerful one, with built in twists and turns as they get closer and closer to hopefully finding her son. I won’t lie, the fact that it is true kind of makes it seem a bit more powerful, even though it shouldn’t affect the movie at all.

I can tell why Dench was nominated for best actress, a great performance on her part, I guess really picking up the nuances of the actual Philomena.

I really don’t even know what to say more? Nice touching movie. Definitely not going to win Best Picture. One of the shorter films nominated for Best Picture, so that was nice. Didn’t feel the need to give a 2.5 hour epic.

3 out of 4.

Skyfall

I have set my standards far too high! For most movies that are coming out in theaters, I have been reviewing them the next week. But for Skyfall, I waited two. My bad, I had to watch the previous two as you knew. Not to mention my general Bond apathy, but don’t let anyone here that. Daniel Craig is a scary man, who might come after me.

Bike it
There is no way I can outrun that shit.

Speaking of running, like all Bond films (maybe?) this one begins with a chase! Bond is in pursuit of some shifty eyed guy, along with another field operative Eve (Naomie Harris). Why? Because that guy was able to get his hands on some data, basically all of the secret agent identities involved with the MI6. Oh jeez, that shouldn’t even be a file! But even worse is that while on a moving train over a river, Eve misses the kill shot and hits Bond instead, causing him to fall to his demise and the bad guy goes free. (She didn’t feel lie re-firing, in shock).

But yeah, Bond being dead screws up some stuff. M (Judi Dench) gets into a lot of trouble with the government. They don’t like secrets being stolen OR dead agents. So Gareth Mallory (Ralph Fiennes) is brought in to help her into retirement and smooth out the transition.

Oh what’s that? Bond isn’t dead? Just hiding out considering retirement? That’s cool. But when his colleagues are getting killed from that list, he reluctantly comes back in to find that man and who is causing all this shit and why. Spoilers? I don’t think so. But Silva (Javier Bardem) is that man, and also a former agent of MI6. He is fed up with their operation, mostly at the way M has treated them. He has felt betrayed at the institution that created him and is looking for redemption. Huh, he is actually pretty similar to Bond when you think about it. Hopefully he isn’t too charismatic.

Don’t fret, we also get a young Q (Ben Whishaw) with “new” and “innovative” gadgets for Bond. Will Bond realize how much of a bitch M has been to them, and get the hell out of Dodge? Also, why not bring up a lot more of Bond’s past as an orphan, those kind of tales are always exciting.

Javi
“Tell me more of how no one has ever truly loved you, James.” Silva, while stroking Bond’s hair.

Whoa whoa whoa. I know my selections are limited, but this has to be my favorite Bond movie. Of all time. Ever. Out of the three. So there is that. I also remember a lot of the plot, while in the first two I can’t even remember who played the bad guys. Maybe they just weren’t famous? I can tell you they were not memorable.

Javier Bardem was fucking memorable. So fucking charismatic. His opening scene was one long take/speech and just perfect. Everything he said was so believable, and humorous as well.

Craig also brought his A-game, but I couldn’t help but think of the movie The Mother during some of those scenes with M. If you know what I mean. (You probably don’t, in The Mother, Daniel Craig fucks a grandmother. A lot).

The action was great, the drama was great, and hell, there was even a giant Komodo Dragon (maybe. A lizardologist can correct me later). Bad ass lizards are my favorite.

The final fight scene really put some nice closure on this part of the Bond era, an I believe Craig is signed on for at least two more movies, and I can actually say that I am excited to see them.

3 out of 4.

Quantum Of Solace

Shocking to probably no one, I don’t know a lot about Bond. While growing up, my parents didn’t like it, so I never was exposed to it and didn’t care. I knew the basics, I played the GoldenEye game. I know his favorite drink…kind of, and know he is friends with letters. But that is about it. I watched my first James Bond movie ever a few weeks ago, Casino Royale. I bought Quantum of Solace a year ago, just couldn’t watch it without Casino first! But I figured with Skyfall, I better get to getting, or else you will all leave me for another site.

But yeah. JameS Bond trivia. I am the suck at it. I thought Casino Royale was decent, took too long to get to the Casino for my taste though.

Desert 1
Watching my second James Bond movie? Excuse me while I get all hot and bothered. And dry. Dry from the title.

Hey guys James Bond (Daniel Craig). He does Bond things. Someone tries to kill M (Judi Dench) but Bond is like, no, and kills him first. But they find out he is a hitman and was also hired by Dominic Greene (Mathieu Amalric) to kill his then girlfriend Camille Montes (Olga Kurylenko).

I am doing so bad at this plot already. But that Dominic Greene guy? He is our major baddie. But the girlfriend is not our bond girl. For that, we have Strawberry Fields (Gemma Arterton), another MI6 agent. Calm down everyone, he can only seduce so many women at a time.

Either way shit happens, eco-terrorism, groundwater, whatever. Felix Jones (Jeffrey Wright) is back in this, and his handler (David Harbour) who I only bring up because he looks funny.

Greene is a member of Quantum, an environmentalist group. Got the name now? But they are trying to get some Oil stocks in Bolivia, weird.

Desert 2
If you google image searched this movie, you would think this is all that happened.

Alright, second Bond movie I’ve ever seen, and well, it was alright.

I still don’t see the major appeal. After all, the James Bond lifestyle is so ingrained in our culture now, it is hardly as impressive. I thought the speed boat chases early on were pretty cool. But man, the scenery? Could have been a lot better, the desert was very unattractive to be in for that long. And man, the title! The title doesn’t make me curious, it makes me weary. It feels like random words put together, and doesn’t actually mean anything. I don’t like that feeling.

But since I am rambling and just saying nothing, I should end this madness. Probably necessary if you want to see Skyfall, obviously. I think I liked Casino Royale more.

2 out of 4.