Tag: Jesse Tyler Ferguson

After I saw the first Ice Age movie, I avoided the rest. It was okay, I just didn’t have any interest in future films.

But then I became a movie reviewer, and in 2012 Ice Age 4: Continental Drift came out, so I had to watch several movies in a short span and my brain became fried. Every film got less and less scientifically accurate.

After a few years I figured we were safe, but no, since Blue Sky Studios has practically no other films coming out, we were given Ice Age: Collision Course, involving outer space. Another frontier for science to be destroyed in.

So many god damn characters now.

Look at all the people I get to talk about. Our original Ice Age crew is still around. Manny (Ray Romano), the mammoth. Sid (John Leguizamo), the ground sloth. Diego (Denis Leary), the saber toothed tiger. And by this time most of them have lovers and extra friends. Manny has Ellie (Queen Latifah), and her two opossum brothers, Crash and Eddie (Seann William Scott, Josh Peck). Diego has Shira (Jennifer Lopez) and they are only briefly thinking about kids. Oh and Sid is all alone, technically.

But Manny and Ellie’s daughter, Peaches (Keke Palmer)? She has found a long term boyfriend as well now. Julian (Adam Devine), a mammoth who wants to marry Peaches and move her far away from the family. That sucks for the parents, but it would be great for the movie, because this cast of characters is already too large.

Scrat and his nut help cause a series of events that begins to hurtle a giant asteroid towards the Earth, putting a damper on their parties. The giant crew quickly runs into a weasel, Buck (Simon Pegg), who is some sort of extreme adventurer and smart entity, who has been living in an underground paradise. He believes the asteroid is being attracted to the Earth at a certain spot and that if they get there, they can stop it. But with him also comes a group of evil winged dinosaurs (Nick Offerman, Max Greenfield, Stephanie Beatriz), who also escaped extinction. They want the asteroid hit so that the mammals will die out and maybe they can rule again.

There you go! I think I got the basic plot in there.

Also featuring voice work from Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Jessie J, Wanda Sykes, and Michael Strahan.

Ah, Simon Pegg, always the light in the darkness.

The pattern seems to continue. Check mate, science. Once again, every further Ice Age film in the franchise decides to take a big poop on science, despite starting off strong. I will say that some of the past discretions are more egregious, most notably being off on Pangaea splitting up by 155~ million years or so. This time, we are being threatened by a meteor, going to destroy the planet. One that is going to hit the same place that killed the dinosaurs, and a previous mass extinction event. The MAJOR plot point is literally just to bring up a real event, and repeat it to give it an old ancient past feel, I guess.

Not only that, but they then go on to imply that events in this film would be responsible for Mars becoming a desert, life less planet RIGHT AFTER saying it would have happened billions of years ago, completely vandalizing our poor time line.

One isn’t supposed to get bent out of shape when faced with inaccuracies in a forgettable animated film, but when the film series used to be accurate and is still trying to showcase science, it gets quite annoying. What hurts me even more so is that Neil deGrasse Tyson not only lends his voice to narrate a few aspects, but they even make a character that is a flash in the pan to look like him for a couple more lines. Damn it Tyson, this movie is not helping get people smarter.

Outside of the science issues, this cast is way too large. No one gets killed off, everyone stays alive, and no one is leaving. So it started too big and then it grew further into the movie. It is beyond manageable and no one can really shine or matter. Not even the original trio. Okay okay, the new guy Buck shines a fuck ton in this film, and they thankfully make him interesting, but it is certainly not enough to save the movie in any way.

And yet, this is not the worst animated film of the year. This isn’t even the worst animated film of the year to imply coldness. Ice Age is lucky Norm of the North exists to give us more context.

As I have pointed out before, Matthew Broderick has been in a bunch of movies the last few years, just none of them big. All smaller releases or indie pictures. Usually drama-comedies. For whatever reason, he just can’t make the big screen anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s out of apathy, and more focus being put on his broadway career.

Either way, I saw a preview for Wonderful World on some random movie, and it made me really want to see it. I looked hard for it, for like, ten minutes too! Then forgot about it. BUT HAH, I GOT IT NOW FUCKERS.

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

Broderick works as an editor for some publishing company. He has been working there for eight years. Most people see it as a temporary job before they do what they really want. Like his good friend Cyril (Jesse Tyler Ferguson, who you all know). “Good friend” is a stretch, more accepting of his cynicism friend is a better choice of words.

Cynicism? Yeah, Broderick isn’t a nice person in this movie. He assumes the world to be bleak, miserable place, where everyone is out to get everyone. He is divorced (shocker) and his only decent moments seem to be the times he gets to hang out with his daughter (Jodelle Ferland). He is oblivious to the fact that her life is also miserable, no friends, no skills, and gets more depressed the more she hangs out with her dad.

Speaking of stuff being shitty. His roommate Ibu (Michael Kenneth Williams, motherfucking Omar) is a diabetic, and during an attack when he tries to get Ibu to the hospital, he finds his car getting towed for an illegal park. Unable to convince the tow truck driver of the real emergency at hand, Ibu collapses in the streets and is sent to the hospital to stay. Well fuck. His sister from Africa (Sanaa Lathan) visits due to his sickness, and stays in their apartment.

Can her presence in his life change it at all, even as the world gets darker? Why is he talking to Philip Baker Hall, who is a made up guy in his head? Does the fact that he used to be a children song writer have anything to do with any of this? Will his case against the city due to towing in an emergency go unheard?

In case you guys didn’t believe me earlier that he was in this movie, here is a picture, that is somehow supposed to be proof!

I feel like I’ve talked about this movie too much already. I liked the set up and liked probably half of what happened in it. But not everything that happened. More importantly, it felt way too slow.

It also didn’t even feel real, which I think is an aspect they were going for. Broderick’s zombie like nature is present about 80% of the film, with snippets of happier times throughout and the end. It isn’t pleasant or interesting to watch. Just want to tell him to be a jerkface. It did get annoying though that almost every character complained to him about his disposition. Repeating records repeat.

I just expected better of the music man.