Tag: Jeff Wahlberg

The Russo Brothers and Tom Holland go together like Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore. Both of them have careers that sometimes intersect and sometimes produce good movies. Yes, I did come up with that comparison myself, why do you ask?

I have a big fan of the Russos since their episodes on Community, and honestly, don’t know if they have done anything bad up to this point. They have done basically all of the best Marvel movies, so it is good to see them move on to a different source material. A book I have never heard of before. And if they bring along someone hoping to break from their boyish and charming mold, then it would be hard to pick someone better than Tom Holland right now.

What is Cherry about? I bet it ain’t about fruit.

I think the Russo brothers intentionally made him look like Tobey Maguire Spider-Man here.

Cherry (Tom Holland) (I can’t really tell you if that is his first name or last or what) is a young college student, a bit off, a bit popular or cool, but still a bit out there. And he sees a girl, Emily (Ciara Bravo, also hoping to lose her kids tv channel roots) and he wants her. He has a girlfriend back at home, but she is the past, Emily is the future.

They begin to couple, and they have a time, but Emily doesn’t know if he is good for her, and decides some forced time apart is important. She goes to Montreal, so he decides to enlist, having not left in his life.

The rest of the film deals with his basic training, his time overseas, the amount of fucked up shit he sees over there, his PTSD from those events, and of course, some nice opioid and heroin addiction leading to a life of crime.

Is that not enough for you? It should be. It is quite a lot of topics for our hero (?) to hit and endure, and it is over 2 hours to make sure it has some breathing room. But not much.

Also starring Jack Reynor, Forrest Goodluck, Jeff Wahlberg, and Damon Wayans Jr.

Oh shit, and now he looks like Uncle Ben’s killer?

I described Cherry as a thrill ride already, but it really is a wild movie. A Wild Cherry film, if you will. I stole that joke from another, but it is okay, because I set them up for it when I was delirious. If I was a smarter man on that day, I would have made it on my own.

This film feels like it definitely was meant to get people to not think of Holland as some sweet kid (And so was the point of The Devil All The Time, right?).  We need to see if Holland can be a mega movie star on his own without the backing power of Disney behind him, and I truly do think he delivers. His character is fast talking, crass, and absolutely in love despite showing it in a weird way. I couldn’t catch a break for this film because the characters in the movie can’t catch them either. Some of the war scenes just totally made my heart sink, and were put in just to show the absurdity of everything in life and how people can just suck.

This is a much better film than the also recently released Chaos Walking, also starring Holland. It is so hard to describe outside of just the topics presented. It feels timely and fresh though nonetheless. It didn’t give me the same feelings of angst as other recent releases like Greenland, but it is still up there in quality. Not for the feint of heart. They use naughty language in this movie. t

When it comes to cartoons that needed a live action remake, Nickelodeon knows where it is at, not Disney. In a year where Disney did it four times, Nickelodeon did it one time, and off a tv show, not a previous film.

Dora the Explorer? Loved by trillions.* It also involves going on an adventure, following maps, doing puzzles? Shit, this is just going to be Tomb Raider but for kids.

Dora and the Lost City of Gold is exactly what we deserve at this point for putting up with these Disney remakes.

And let’s hope it doesn’t get ruined by creepy pedos.

Dora (Isabela Merced) wants to be an explorer! Like her parents (Eva Longoria, Micahel Peña), she has lived in the jungle most of her life, learning its ways and wanting to find more new things! She is not a lousy treasure hunter, she is an explorer, damn it.

But her parents send her off to the city for high school to socialize. Ugh. She can reunite with her cousin Diego (Jeff Wahlberg), but school is weird, people are mean. And in a museum trip, she is tricked by the staff into getting shipped back to the jungle! Some bad people want to use her to find her parents an the lost city of gold! So now, with the help of Diego, her friends (Madeleine Madden, Nicholas Coombe) and a friend of her parents (Eugenio Derbez), she is going to have to combine their wits, outsmart the baddies, and not allow any more swiping.

Also starring Natasa Ristic, Christopher Kirby, Temuera Morrison, Pia Miller, Joey Vieira, Madelyn Miranda, Malachi Barton, and Danny Trejo as Boots the monkey and Benicio del Toro as Swiper the Fox.

Tenn power can solve all problems in the world!

Dora was a great family film, with jokes for everyone to get involved with. Some quick fart sounds when necessary, but the scene didn’t last too long. Some songs and many show references for those who have seen it, but still a cute adventure story for teens to get behind.

It points out problems of movies like Tomb Raider, keeping it all tongue and cheek, while also doing a lot of its own thing. The puzzles are in the way to be solved quickly by our heroes, and just a stepping stone. The real purpose is the adventure and the jokes.

Many times I was laughing out at scenes different from my own kids, while they got enjoyment from more of the slapstick stuff. And hey, whatever works.

I think the next appropriate follow up for Nickelodeon is to make a movie about Stick Stickley. If Forky can get big, why not their OG piece of trash?