Liz & Dick

Lindsay Lohan has had a troublesome last few years, with her last film role being sexy daughter, in Machete. We all know about the arrests, the drugs, the drinking, the car accidents, but maybe, just maybe, she was doing all of that with a purpose?

Maybe she was secretly doing research on how Elizabeth Taylor might have lived. I don’t know if Taylor was ever into the partying lifestyle, I only know about her many husbands. In fact, getting hitched and divorced seems to be the only thing Lohan didn’t do over the last few years. I take it all back, it was probably just the drugs.

Just in case you missed it, I am saying that Lindsay Lohan is probably nothing like Elizabeth Taylor.

But Lohan needs a comeback, damn it, so she does what any good actress would do. She agrees to play Elizabeth Taylor in Lifetime Original Movie!

Liz & Dick is the “True story” of the relationship between Taylor and Richard Burton (Grant Bowler) and uhh, that is about it.

They met on the set of Cleopatra, and although they were both currently married, they eventually hit it off. Then they have sexy love time, fight a lot, star in each others movies, and then Richard Burton dies.

Hopefully you didn’t want any more detail, because that is about how much the movie provides. Around 90 minutes in actual screen time, “Liz & Dick” does a great job at rushing through every scene and telling as little plot as possible. Apparently the movie was filmed in about 20 days and boy does it show.

But they fight a lot! There is that! Yeah!

Taylor herself was a very successful actress and winner of multiple academy awards. Burton, despite the lack of awards, was known for his great acting especially on stage. Take two interesting people and make a movie of their love life, you’d think it would work out well, yet somehow this film fails to deliver. I am not even blaming this on Lohan. She was okay in her role, I guess. Bowler was a bit better, but combined, neither of them really told a compelling story.

Heck, it even had Creed Bratton from The Office show up for a small role, which means you know they weren’t going for quality.

Liz & Dick should be avoided at all costs. Some of you would say that was obvious given the cast and TV movie format, but that would be judging a book by its cover! Apparently an acceptable practice in this movie’s case.