Everly

Day 2 of Yay Women Week. I think it works as a theme title, so I have decided to keep it.

Everly came out a couple weeks ago and I picked it to review from both a suggestion and because it looked like it offered something different. I haven’t gotten to do the weirder movies as much as I had wanted recently and it is always good to shoehorn my viewings into the schedule. I blame the fact that too many movies hit theaters clearly. We should just cut out a third of them and make it so they were never made. Everyone would be happier, and more weird shit could get reviewed. Like, when is the last time I watched a shitty sex comedy B-Movie?? Exactly.

Everly is not that, although it does get suggestive at some points. I think the only thing that keeps Everly from qualifying as some sort of exploitation movie is the fact that the lead star people actually recognize.

Ah yes, the star of Fools Rush In.

GUNS AND NAKEDNESS. BANG BANG BOOM. SCREAMING.

That’s how we enter the bathroom of this apartment, where Everly (Salma Hayek) is beaten and freaking out. But hey, she has hidden a gun in her toilet, which she is able to claim and kill several men in her apartment. Da fuq?

Everly is a prostitute apparently. She lives in a complex with a lot of other prostitutes, working for one criminal overlord Taiko (Hiroyuki Watanabe). For whatever reason, he has sent men to kill her. That didn’t work. Guess he is going to have to offer a cash reward to the building to take her out.

This includes other prostitutes, other assassins, some sick motherfuckers, and the boss himself if it comes down to it.

Everly, mostly on her own, just wants to survive and leave the building. And to get in contact with her mother (Laura Cepeda) and daughter (Aisha Ayamah)!! who also end up at the place. Oh fuck.

And then some more guns and violence and guns. And a sadist (Togo Igawa).

Guns a blazin’, and we aren’t talking about the one with the bullets.

Arguably, there is not a lot going on in this movie plot wise. But neither did The Raid: Redemption. It also drops your off RIGHT in the middle of a bunch of shit going down and it makes you keep up. A very hectic movie, constantly moving, with a lot of fucked up scenes.

That is the TL;DR I guessed. It is actually quite lowly rated on IMDB. Surprisingly so. I think that it is just because it is a weird and non standard movie, most people just shrug it off immediately. One of those, “Well, it wasn’t in theaters, so it must suck and can’t win awards!”. One of those is true. No awards will be won.

But will you be entertained? Highly probably. If not you will be just grossed out and kind of hate it. I guess it could go either way.

If you think it is the type of thing that sounds exciting, you will in fact enjoy this movie. If you are iffy, then definitely don’t watch it. You will probably hate it. Simple enough!