Tag: Natalie Portman

Hey look, an R Rated romcom my brother said was really good. No Strings Attached refers to sex, completely. Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman want to have sex, and not worry about a relationship. That is the whole plot in a nutshell.

I should let you know that I don’t think Natalie Portman is the hottest thing ever. Not my style of chick. Kind of creeps me out. But her with Kutcher is pretty unbelievable, so I had a hard time accepting that part. Anything with Kutcher seems to automatically get a negative grade from me. I won’t even watch Killers (besides thinking it trying to copy Knight and Day and also be worse at it). Okay, I will watch Killers eventually, but man will I be biased. Kutcher cannot be a serious main male lead, and can only stick to awkward comedies I think. They keep putting him in these romantic comedies though, so I guess women find him attractive.

Not these women though.

As a movie focused entirely on sex, it had a lot of sex related humor. Jokes were pretty funny, but mostly from the supporting cast (Portman’s roommates). But by the end I was kind of bored with the movie, and didn’t really like the ending. I almost thought “the dawson” played douche doctor guy, but nope. Some other dude I have never heard of.

Cary Elwes ninja’d his way into a pseudo cameo role though. Beardface doctor. I might be rambling.

“It’s Beardfacé. Why do you people insist on calling me Beardface!?”

2 out of 4.

I had already seen this movie in theaters, but never in Blu-Ray or Unrated. So, sorry for anyone hoping for a one time viewing review, you get at two time viewing review. Eat it! I must say also I didn’t really get the reason for the title until many weeks later. Your Highness? Alright. A stoner flick called a greeting to a king. Hey there is smoke on the cover. Oh wait. A stoner flick and…highness….wait for it…

OHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh. I got it now.

For some reason, I enjoyed it more the second time around. In theaters I was disappointed, thought they just half-assed the whole movie. Technically, yes it actually was half-assed though, as there may not have ever been a script (/if there was a script, they never used it). I am told that most of the movie was filmed as pretty much improvised.

Maybe I was hoping Franco was as ridiculous as McBride in this movie? I just felt like it could have done a lot better. I think this was the first big release from Natalie Portman after Black Swan, so that probably angered some people too. You know, the ones demanding she pick a genre and stick to it. Zooey Deschanel was in this movie too, and super hot. Even when she went all sex demon.

For the unrated version, I couldn’t even tell what scenes were added, except maybe a conversation between Franco/Zooey before the wedding. Maybe all that was really added in was more blood in death scenes. So, the difference between theatrical and unrated is negligible.

Black Swan, Pretty Popular, not for me.

Okay I get it. Natalie Portman. She can be a great actress. In this movie she is supposed to play this very sheltered girl trying to get into her “Black Swan side” in order to get the big part of the ballet she has dreamed about forever. The director thinks she is too pure. She must prove him wrong! Also, she has mental problems that she never knew about. (Well, that she ignored).

That sucks. But I feel like if a person does a good portrayal of someone fucked up, then they get academy award talk and chatter. People will say I don’t get it, but there was much to get. Everything that happens in the film is easily explained, and the transformation at the end is just a metaphor. Hard work alone doesn’t deserve a great review. I need to be interested, and I failed to find this interesting.

Mila Kunis kind of bored me too. She is supposed to be the wild child in this movie. She is, definitely way more than Portman. But I just didn’t see her as a ballet dancer. Also the lesbian scene creeped me out too. I think I was supposed to be, but I am pretty sure the concept was a big reason why a lot of people went to see it.

“Oh! Sorry I came in without knocking. Yeah…I’ll leave…right now…yeah…leaving…okay…gone.”