Tag: Chelsea Handler

Just when you thought we were done with Halloween movies, I pull a fast one on you. Fun Size is a barely advertised kids movie about the wonders of Halloween. It deals with teen problems like choosing a college, losing a parent, having weird siblings, and just trying to get some.

Get some what? You know what.

Dorothy and a Cat. Basically the two easiest costumes for Halloween.

Wren (Victoria Justice) is a high school senior who lives in Ohio. Her dad passed away last year, and her family has never been the same. Her mom (Chelsea Handler) is looking for love in younger men, and her younger brother Albert (Jackson Nicoll) hasn’t spoken a word since the incident.

But hey, it’s Halloween, the dad’s favorite holiday, so everyone is going to be a bit weird. Wren wanted to go party with her best friend, April (Jane Levy) at a cute boys house. A musician!  Wren doesn’t care that much, she is kind of nerdy, but April in their drive to stay cool has convinced her that he is the one for her!

Her other nerd friends too nerdy. Roosevelt (Thomas Mann), who has lesbian mothers, and Peng (Osric Chau) because he is Asian. But Wren’s horrible mother black mails her into watching Albert on Halloween, because that is the only way she will sign her financial aid forms to NYU. Unfortunately for Wren, Albert is a clever little devil and escapes on Halloween night to have his own shenanigans.

So she is forced to look for him with the nerds and April, while also figuring out what she wants to do in her life. Albert befriends a convenience store clerk named Fuzzy (Thomas Middleditch), who can talk enough for the both of them while he plans revenge on the man who ruined his last relationship.

(I apologize for the shitty image) but I think this movie might make the one armed Spider-Man a “thing”.

Yes, strange as it may seem, this was not the worst movie I have ever seen. When I saw it in the theater, I was the only one there. The only other time that happened was with Madea’s Witness Protection and usually it is a bad omen. But it was a made for kids, Nickelodeon movie, so I understood the target audience.

Sure, parts of it made me fill with rage at how bad everything was going. Yet there were still scenes I found enjoyable/funny. The acting isn’t great at all, most of the friend characters are all stereotypes. They do feature some character growth, but in an obvious way. You know how all the relationships will work out well in advance, and offers nothing new. But yet, it is charming in a way. Sure, the Albert character started out as annoying, but he really was the main reason this film could be considered average. I enjoyed his shenanigans with Thomas Middleditch, and how Thomas Mann’s character grew some balls by the end.

There might be an issue of loose morals going on with the movie, after all, it is Nickelodeon and it involves sex! But hey, kids need to grow up sometime. I actually don’t know a single person who I could recommend this movie too, but it is fun seeing Jane Levy in a role that is the complete opposite of her character in Suburgatory. The problem is I think the boring parts outweighed the interesting ones, and even though it isn’t terrible, it still isn’t that good either.

I’d like to think that they made This Means War after the successes of Knight and Day and Killers, the former that I love, the later that I don’t ever want to see. I mean, Spies and love seemed to have work. So why not actually make it spies competing for love?

It’s like lets take all the action from those movies, and turn it into zany hijinks to learn secrets about a woman and win her heart?

This is the kind of stuff that encourage people to stalk their loved ones.

Lauren (Reese Witherspoon) is just a girl, who does product testing for a living in a city where she is alone except for one of her good friends (Chelsea Handler). She has relationship problems, because she moved there to be with her ex, who ended up cheating on her. So she dumped him. But she is all alone now! And the ex is totally getting married to the woman who was the cheatee. Damn.

Tuck (Tom Hardy) and FDR (Chris Pine) are CIA operatives who are a bit too reckless, so they get grounded for a bit. Finding themselves with a lot of free time, they go back on the market. Tuck, while being British, also has a young son, and an ex wife (who didn’t like all of his travel as a “Travel Agent”), decides to join a dating website where he meets Lauren. FDR, a ladies man, ends up meeting Lauren at a movie rental place (those exist?) and she doesn’t like him at first, but has to go on a date with him just because he is persistent.

Little do they know they are now pursuing the same girl, so they lay some ground rules. No letting her know their real identities (a given), that they know each other, and definitely no sex, not until she has picked. But they also have to do some CIA things, like stop some Heinrich (Til Schweiger) guy that only kind of matters to the plot. Mostly at the end to fuck things up.

Speaking of fuck things up, Lauren ends up liking both guys, and vice versa, who saw that coming? Her friend encourages her to date both, but when she still can’t decide, the tiebreaker has to go down to the “Fuck test”. Ruh roh. Their job is effected, loss of friends, loss of trust, spy problems, etc. In other news, I wish this was a Warhammer game, because the title could have been more epic.

This. Means. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

That joke is for a very specific kind of nerd.

Here is where I say there was good and bad parts of the movie, overall just making it okay. I liked the plot actually, but thought it ended lame. I didn’t think there was much chemistry between either couple, although the guys felt like friends for most of the movie.

I didn’t like the force villain approach either. Makes since for them to have to do actually do a job eventually, but eh, if they were grounded, the whole movie could have just been them doing spy things to spy on the girl, and interfere with each others dates. Actual action every once in awhile just felt weird.

None of the performances are too great either. Just okay.