Transformers: Dark Of The Moon

Right off the back, I can say that Transformers3 was better than Transformer2, but why the heck was it 150 minutes long? Halfway through it I can say I was pretty bored. Here are some things that bugged me. Rosie H-W. What the hell.

They kept taking jabs at Megan Fox the whole movie, it almost seemed like thats the only reason T3 existed, because Bay hates Fox. I mean, his reasoning is correct. She isn’t a good actress. When I heard they were replacing Fox, I thought YES. Bring in an actress who can act, or no love interest at all! Nope. Friggan Rose H-W, giraffe neck and all.

Rosie H-W Giraffe
Seriously, look at that neck.

Bah. So anyways. Similar to the second movie, they do almost repeat a plot point. The “Oh no, Optimus Prime is dead!” one. Also an older once thought dead transformer switches sides. Also, the government wants to control the autobots, not tell Shia anything, and then get screwed over and have to rely on a kid and his car. Also it seemed to me that I couldn’t tell any of the decepticons apart. They were lacking a lot in color. Also, some CGI is bad. In Chicago, when Shia was being flailed on a whip, it looked like they turned him into a cartoon. Also, why are all the decepticon like weird animal robots?

Beast Wars
Although Beast Wars is great, regular Transformers turn into cars/automobiles/gadgets.

That’s a paragraph of bad things!^ Optimus Prime is still a badass. I still couldnt give a damn about any other autobot. I just wanted to see OP be, well, OP. He definitely was in the few fight scenes I got to see.

Also, despite being probably a huge plothole, I think most of the people in Chicago died? If not at least the entirety of the town is pretty much destroyed, which is good for everyone I think. Now they can disperse throughout the Midwest, or all move to Detroit to make that place poppin’. The movie did end on a quick note. I was like. Wait what? 2.5 hours and then bam ending like that? No repercussions? Arent there hundreds of decepticons around the world with beacons still causing havoc? Whatever. At least they didn’t save Chicago.

2 out of 4.

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