Trainwreck

In all honesty, when I first heard about the movie Trainwreck, I really really really thought that this movie would involve a train. A couple meets on a train and talk and get to know each other. And hilarious things happen. But that is basically Before Sunrise minus comedy. Trainwreck is nothing like Before Sunrise, unfortunately.

So, no train. Maybe that means it will be like Trainspotting. That had no train right? It has been awhile.

Cena
There is a train of pain in his arms though.

Amy (Amy Schumer, yes she plays herself or something), is the trainwreck in question. Why? Because she is promiscuous after sex doesn’t stick around. Oh no! Why is she like this? Because her father (Colin Quinn), when divorcing their mom, told them love isn’t real and to not trust it. Didn’t affect her younger sister, Kim (Brie Larson), though. She is in a nice relationship, married to a man (Mike Birbiglia) and helping to raise his son (Evan Brinkman). Ugh, stable relationships, yuck.

The only thing sort of stable is Amy’s relationship with Steven (John Cena), except that is getting a bit rocky too as Steven might want something deeper.

Anyways, Amy works at a shitty magazine, and her boss (Tilda Swinton) wants her to do an article about a guy named Aaron (Bill Hader), who is a sports injury surgeon. He is the best surgeon too, working with the best athletes to repair their legs and knees to get them back in the game. He is even BFF’s with LeBron James (LeBron James)! Too bad Amy hates sports.

But hey, dorky Aaron is a nice guy. She should sleep with him and dump him. But he is so endearing. Maybe she will date him. Yeah. Sounds good.

Also featuring smaller roles by Dave Attell as a bum, and Vanessa Bayer, Randall Park and Jon Glaser as coworkers, and Ezra Miller as an intern.

Lebron
I didn’t know LeBron was that much of an actor, but he plays the fuck out of himself.

Trainwreck is directed by Judd Apatow and it feels very much like an Apatow movie. It is too long, it has long unfunny periods, and everyone is a bit awkward talking about real issues.

It is also written by Amy Schumer, and thus, the main characters name and I guess mostly her jokes? Hard to say, I haven’t seen her shows or stand up or anything really. But everything is about sex, making this an adult comedy about adult things. Get your big boy pants on.

Either way, the film on its own isn’t that great. The romance doesn’t seem to make a lot of sense and Hader’s character is legitimately boring. Schumer’s character gets old relatively quick, because it seems like it is just the same joke over and over again.

But cameos make this movie. Cena and LeBron are amazing. Ah maze ing. Cena didn’t have as many scenes, but he rocked it each time. LeBron is in this film a lot more, and does a great fake version of himself. His jokes are great, although also a bit repetitive.

Overall, the cameos makes it worth it. Despite the meh leads and overall length.

2 out of 4.

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