Tag: Lou Ferrigno

2020 is a weird year, for life, for cinema, for you, likely, in all aspects.

And through the ashes of this year, despite how high they pile up, is this the year that Pauly Shore rises through those ashes? The great phoenix, often spoken about in hushed tones as a relic from the 90’s.

He has been missing from cinema for some time, with the occasional cameo, or playing himself, or documentary series, but as a lead? The last time he was the lead or co-lead in a film was in 1997, something called The Curse of Inferno, which I also never heard about before in my life until typing this up a second ago.

That doesn’t mean he cannot come back and be a force to be reckoned with, for the new movie Guest House. It isn’t like he was just lying dormant in a basement somewhere waiting for a time to strike. Hell, we had Bill and Ted Face the Music just last week, and that was surprising in that it wasn’t terrible, unlike many comedy sequels that have been coming out decades later.

So. There. Is (was?). A. Chance.

“‘Never Tell Me The Odds’ – Han Solo” – Pauly Shore

Sarah (Aimee Teegarden) and Blake (Mike Castle) are not newlyweds, and they aren’t even engaged, but they are looking to get a house together. A big commitment, and something that is only doable because of Sarah’s dad (Billy Zane) helping out, even if he doesn’t approve much of Blake because of his slacker and party past.

After a long search, they find nothing good in their price range, until they found the perfect house. Lots of space, a big yard, a pool, and a guest house! So what is the catch? Oh, there is someone living in the guest house. Randy Cockfield (Pauly Shore), a user of drugs and alcohol, a loud mouth, a exhibitionist, and all together strange person. He was there from the previous owner and totally “about to leave” so that is why the main house is cheap.

They end up taking the deal, because he will be gone soon. And the rest of the movie plot sort of writes itself. Is he actually trying to leave? You know he isn’t. And with squatter rights in California as they are, it would be a long and lengthy and expensive battle to even get him out of that place, so it looks like they will have to go to war.

Also starring Lou Ferrigno, Erik Griffin, Steve-O, Liz Katz, and Chris Kattan.

How excited am I to see Chris Kattan in a movie? Well…

Okay, it turn out this is not Pauly’s time to rise out of the ashes.

Guest House was certifiably not a great film. Right away, the cinematography leaves a lot to be desired, feeling like it is a made for TV film. It doesn’t go for interesting anything with the camera, and it just feels so dreamy, I guess is a way to describe it.

The main characters? None of them are people we care about. The couple is bad to each other and bad people in general who clearly shouldn’t be together. The husband’s job feels so unimportant, with bad coworkers, so we don’t end up caring about that either.

As for Shore, the third main character, he is playing a meaner and more lewd character than he ever played. It isn’t an R-rated Weasel, it is just a not fun person. I can’t even imagine them having friends that would want to stop by and do drugs? It is hard to believe that level of king party animal.

The events that happen are just contrived, and even the lessons learned at the end are not how I would take it away in real life. It is a miserable situation for miserable people to be in, and we are all losers for having to watch it.

So, Generation Iron came to town, so I had to watch it in theaters. My first question was, what in the fuck is Generation Iron? Basically, it is a sequel to Pumping Iron, a documentary that came out in the late 70s to introduce the world more to the idea of bodybuilding and Mr. Olympia.

The purpose of this one? I guess to remind us that Mr. Olympia and bodybuilding are still a thing, and they want attention, damn it.

Unless they are dressing up like ninjas, then they do not want to be seen.

The year, 2011, and Phil Heath has just won the Mr. Olympia contest, his first ever. In fact, he won with a perfect score. Could he be the next big deal?

Well, he thinks so, he is a cocky son of a bitch, who talks about perfection, and just trying to beat himself at this point.

This film details the lives of several current big name body builders who hope to take the title, and who are going through many different paths to achieve that goal. A lot of names, could list them all, but I just want to note Kai Greene, who looks way too friendly to be a body builder, and Dennis Wolf, who is the real life incarnation of Rainier Wolfcastle.

The film talks about it all. Science, training regiments, heart, why they get so bronzed up before a competition, and steroids. Yes, even steroids. They don’t avoid the subject, they talk about it straight on…just…uneasily.

Also a lot of guest stars. Arnold Schwarzenegger, Lou Ferrigno, Busta Rhymes, Michael Jai White, and awkwardly narrated by Mickey Rourke. Why awkward? Well, because he didn’t really add much to to it. Just said some stuff, usually poetic, every once in awhile. Kind of creeped me out.

Then it of course goes into the 2012 Mr. Olympia contest, showing us how its all done, and yeah. Movie! Woo weights!

If they knew how to fight, they could kick all of our asses.

Again, documentaries are kind of strange to review, but here is my attempt. This movie gave a really good view of bodybuilding from what felt a neutral stand point. Despite Phil being the winner, they didn’t attempt to show him in a positive light, they let him be himself (and he is apparently an egotistical asshole. Alright, maybe they hate him and it was cut that way?). We got to see the good and bad of lots of contenders, who come from many different backgrounds and abilities. I loved its neutrality on all the issues, and the fact that they even brought up steroids. Made me happy.

I am not a fan of these competitions, because they are just so damn biased, they don’t make much sense to me. Why do all the champions win so many times in a row? Probably because the judges are just making shit up and basing it off of who has won before and who should win now. That is my guess. Kind of hard to ignore. No real way to do a blind taste test.

In general, the Mr. Olympia show looks like shit. Especially in 2012, when there is no suspense as to who will win. Why? Because they will call certain competitors back out to get second look, but only if they are the top overall people. If they suck, they don’t want to see you again. They just give extra time to the people who they like, so again, no real suspense, seems pointless to me. They should give everyone equal time, more fair.

But eh. It is an okay movie. I think it was too long, had some boring stretches, and I forgot the difference between a few people. Phil wins 2012, which is not a spoiler, because the 2013 competition has already happened when this came out in theaters. That is three in a row for Phil. They should really get this out quicker, its already old and awkward. Can’t be too hard to polish up a documentary.