Tag: John Hawkes

I try my best to avoid most trailers for films, but I give myself some exceptions. I will watch a real teaser trailer occasionally, as they are the ones who don’t spoil the whole thing. Teaser trailers especially for superhero films or Pixar/Disney stuff, even though some of the teasers are downright terrible.

But sometimes a film comes along with such a unique name, that I just need to know what it is about, right away. I will watch it right away, intrigued, which is what a movie title should do. Unlike every other film I review this week after this movie, because all of their titles are shit, regardless of film quality.

Only some offense meant for the films this week that I won’t name. Back to this title. Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri just grabs the viewer by the balls and tells them to get ready for a very fucking specific story.

Even better, despite being an original story, it might have been inspired by a true event. In Minnesota last year, a citizen took out a billboard calling out the sheriff with vulgar language. If you read a news article, it seems like a completely bull shit story, so who cares about that guy. But when I saw it in person I had my wife look it up on her phone (I was driving) because the gossip just had to be too good.

Again, a shit story, but it felt juicy, so I am glad to see this film do something much better with the concept.

And I will only show you one of the billboards in this review, neener neener.

Mildred (Frances McDormand) has a problem. A problem letting go and moving on with her life, after her dad was found dead, burned alive, after being raped. A heinous, terrible crime, and honestly, it makes sense for her to not get over it. Her daughter was still a teenager and they are in such a small town, it is inexcusable and unprecedented for this to have happened.

But what is even worse, in her mind, is that the local police force seems to have given up on finding the killer. She hasn’t heard from them in 8 months and she is rightfully pissed off. So she spends most of her savings on renting out three billboards near her home, ones that have been seemingly forgotten about, to call out the local Sheriff (Woody Harrelson).

This causes quite a stir, more so than the rape/murder. The town likes the sheriff, he is a good guy, and he has goddamn cancer. Mildred doesn’t care, she just wants answers to her questions, even though she knows it will not bring her daughter back. Mildred is going to be burning several bridges to get what she needs, metaphorically and slightly literally (buildings are like bridges, right?). Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Also starring Caleb Landry Jones, Sam Rockwell, Abbie Cornish, Lucas Hedges, Zeljko Ivanek, Amanda Warren, Malaya Rivera Drew, Peter Dinklage, Sandy Martin, John Hawkes, Samara Weaving, and Clarke Peters.

Two Cops near a billboard outside Ebbing, Missouri.

Three Billboards is a hard movie, with a hard topic, with, you guessed it, hard characters. It earned a hard R rating, when it comes to language, violence, and the occasional gore. No, not on any hardcore graphical porn level, sorry folks, just everything else.

McDormand carries the film on her poor fragile shoulders where the whole thing just feels incredibly realistic. Her grief and anger can only be described as real grief and anger. Harrelson as a supporting character still feels a bit like Harrelson, but from a different angle that I haven’t seen much before. Rockwell does one of the biggest changes, as he puts all of his charismatic roles in the past to play this disgusting, morally terrible individual. He is racist, xenophobic, crass, yet caring in strange ways. Oh, and he doesn’t even dance. Can Sam Rockwell be in a film where he doesn’t dance?

The story is an emotional and moving piece. After all, everyone deals with loss in their own ways, and McDormand’s character comes from the place of a woman who feels like she has nothing left to lose (except her son, which she admittedly forgets somewhat about). But again, it is more than just her story in this small town of individuals. At least four or five other characters get shining moments, even if just a little bit, as parts of their stories fortunately (or unfortunately) intersect with her own.

I would describe only one scene that I did not like at all, and it involved a flashback. The words used were too specific and forced, they instantly drew me out of the movie. Thankfully the strong story and characters were quick to draw me back in.

Living in a small town, like a real small town, will get quite annoying when everyone knows everyone’s business, including the law enforcers. I didn’t grow up in an environment like this personally, but based on what I have seen in other films and stories from others, it definitely seems to grasp that feeling.

Three Billboards is not a film for everyone, which is shame, given how likely it will end up on my end of the year list.

Here is a dumb question you can ask your friends and coworkers if you want them to dislike you a little bit more than they already do.

“Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth?” This will make them ponder and come up with some bad guess, and you can quickly toss in a “It was still Mount Everest, it just wasn’t discovered, dipshit!” And again, you will lose friends.

My main problem with this joke, as a geophysicist/movie reviewer, is that it assumes that Mount Everest was always the tallest mountain on Earth, and that things don’t change. But we know they change, we know India and Asia weren’t always smashing into each other, so there is a real answer to the question of what used to be the tallest mountain before Mount Everest took over.

Turns out this knowledge is hard to get to and a bit awkward. But know there is a real answer out there. Just modern technology hasn’t always existed.

Oh yeah, I am supposed to talk about Everest. I think I should watch it on a large screen to give the large mountain its necessary honor.

Like a very gentle soft touch on its top most tip.

About 50-55 million years ago, India collided with Asia. It was probably the fastest moving tectonic plate ever, as it split with what is now Madagascar, presumably looking for a new climate. India was on an oceanic plate that was subducting under Asia at the time, which is the why it moved so fast. Once they crashed, the Himalaya mountains decided to be a thing, as the two land masses crumbled into each other, upward and forward! They grew fast and grew hard, making some really tall mountains that are still growing today. Mount Everest, aka Sagarm?th?, aka Chomolungma, currently sitting at 29,029 ft above sea level. Everest’s main purpose seems to be looking tall and killing crazy white assholes.

Oh, but maybe you care about those assholes? Well in that case, the film itself takes place in 1996, based on a real life disaster that took place that year and had like, five books written about it from survivors. Lot of primary sources to work with.

But our main character is Rob Hall (Jason Clarke), owner of Adventure Consultants out of New Zealand leads groups up Everest for large sums, helping them the whole way. He was the first to do this as a commercial business. There is also Scott Fischer (Jake Gyllenhaal), main guide of Mountain Madness, who started doing the same thing later. In 1996, it was extremely popular though, and there were dozens of groups up there, all trying to use the few mountain paths to make it to the top, around the same time, causing a lot of problems.

Speaking of people, we have a few more notables. Like the fact that Rob’s wife (Kiera Knightley) is at home, pregnant, ready to give birth not long after his return. And Jon Krakauer (Michael Kelly), a journalist who is going to write about his experience. And Doug Hansen (John Hawkes), a regular guy who worked three jobs to save up money to hike Everest, making his second attempt to the peak to help school kids realize that dreams come true! And Beck Weathers (Josh Brolin), from Texas, a cocky dude who feels good when he climbs, but is depressed back at home. And and and and of course Anatoli Boukreev (Ingvar Eggert Sigurðsson), one of the guides working with Fischer, and a general bamf climber.

Honestly, plot reviews are easy in this case, because I don’t have to describe bad things happening. I just have to talk about who is involved. And since it is such a big cast, here are a few other people involved!

Emily Watson played the base camp leader with Elizabeth Debicki as their team doctor. Thomas M. Wright, Martin Henderson, and Tom Goodman-Hill play the other 3 guides and Sam Worthington plays a literal Guy who works with Adventuring Consultants, and in real life later becomes their director and CEO. Naoko Mori plays Yasuko Namba, who had climbed 6 of the 7 main peaks with Everest as her last, and Robin Wright as the wife of Beck Weathers.

Color coding the hikers is a good strategy, but I feel bad for anyone who got stuck with red.

Apparently, sometimes, I get a little bit emotional over some geology. Because at least one scene in particular had me bawling my eyes out. I mean I found myself crying in the dark theater, surrounded by strangers, crying for like two minutes. It wasn’t even at the end of film, it was probably about 80% of the way through. I am just an emotional wreck since I had a baby, I guess.

Everest is an intense, dramatic, and gorgeous film. It was made in particular to be experience first hand on an IMAX screen. Sure, in the beginning, it is a bit weird as we get some character introductions, watching them hike to base camp and the weeks of training before they finally climb. It isn’t just a group of people running up a hill and facing constant threats. They don’t slowly die one at a time like it is a horror film. This is based on a true story and the attention to detail is astounding. It is easy to get things right when you have multiple books to figure it all out.

The last 40 minutes is extremely gripping. Not knowing the actual story, I didn’t know who would make it out alive so I was afraid for everyone. They all feel like real people and it is easy to connect with many of them before their eventual ascent.

Finally, I think my favorite part of this movie is that it isn’t about a group of people trying to battle nature and show their dominance. It is really about a mountain, who gives zero fucks about the insignificant life forms that sometimes explore its slopes. It is about how nature is unforgiving and doesn’t care about how much prep work occurs, it will do what it wants, when it wants. It is about how life doesn’t care if you are a good person, or a bad person, a newbie or a trainer climber, you are just as likely to get killed in a heart beat.

Nature is a fucking beast. And Everest is fucking good.

When they announced the nominees for the Academy Awards this year, nothing really surprised me. Yes yes, snubs and what nots, but I had at least heard of every (American) movie on the list. Every one, but The Sessions. To be fair it was only nominated for one award, but that award is Best Actress. I mean, something crazy must be going on in that movie then, damn it.

Then I found out it was about a guy in an iron lung.

This is the best picture I could find of him in the lung. What the hell?

Originally I was mad about the concept of an iron lung, but now I am mad that there is no picture of him in the lung online. Why was I mad originally? Because, what the hell, an iron lung? Stop it. Just stop it. Iron Lungs, popular over 50 years ago, became non-existant after they fucked up Polio and got their technology on. Just popping out a movie about a guy in an iron lung wanting to lose his virginity just seems silly.

What? It’s a true story, based on the book of the guy who wrote about his life in an iron lung? Damn it. Fine. Carry on.

Mark O’Brien (John Hawkes) is in an iron lung, got the Polio when he was six, it has been a long life of laying down. He decided to become a writer, because he sure a hell couldn’t do anything else. He did poems, short stories, eventually a book on his life. Either way, he was lonely. Lonely in the pants. He was a middle aged man who hasn’t even groped a boob, let alone done the business. Hard to when you can barely move your head.

Eventually he learns about a sex surrogate. Definitely not a prostitute. Their is payment for sessions, and her job is to help him experience his sexuality, but there is a limit. The max number of sessions he can do is six, no more, certainly can do less. He gets his priest’s permission (William H. Fucking Macy), and sets up to do the business.

Who is the sex surrogate? Someone named Cheryl (Helen Hunt). She is even married, and the husband is fine with it. She leads Mark on a journey of experiencing an orgasm, full penetration, and boobs! Also, Moon Bloodgood and Annika Marks play some of his care assistants.

Spoilers – Sex Happens.

Now I know what you guys are wondering. How the hell can Helen Hunt play in a movie where he is a sex master and having sex with someone with polio. She wouldn’t get naked on camera. Would she?

Yes. Yes she would. Helen Hunt is super naked in this movie, full friggan body. And unless you are Anne Hathaway, that usually earns you a nomination.

As for the rest of the movie, it was a sweet story, if not incredible awkward. John Hawkes is probably more deserving of a nomination than Hunt, but that could just because he had a disability. We all know what happens when actors play with disabilities.

I will admit, I tried to watch Winter’s Bone before and found myself lost have thirty minutes. But that is only because I was multi tasking it up, and didn’t really pay attention to it. Bad movie reviewer, bad! Which is why I stopped watching it.

And then, you know, kept putting it off. But hey, look, I did it. Get off my back, world.

“And after this, I will teach you how to use a bow and arrow. It could save your life!”

Yay meth! Meth, the best drug ever. Developed all across America, either in giant underground factories, or in small mountain towns where the law has no reach. Well, this ain’t Breaking Bad, so you can figure out where this takes place.

Ree (Jennifer Lawrence) is a 17yr old girl, with two younger siblings, and a mother who just ain’t there in the head. She has a daddy too, but he hasn’t been seen in a few weeks. He was arrested for cooking Meth, released on a bond, but now he has gone up and maybe R-U-N-N-O-F-T.

But that can’t be! Their family ain’t no cowards. Something else must up. But time is a runnin’ out. If he doesn’t show up for his court date, they will lose the bond, and apparently the house. Shit, they are already poor enough.

So she sets off on a mini-journey investigating the whereabouts of he pa, including her meth addicted uncle Teardrop (John Hawkes), up to the local crime boss and his army of women soldiers (Sheryl Lee).

“No, don’t volunteer yourself to go to the games for your younger siblings! Don’t do it!”

Winter’s Bone is definitely a lot better if you actually paying attention to what is going on. The thing you should probably realize is that this movie is a lot slower than other modern movies, so ADD people, stay away.

As Ree began to unravel her father’s disappearance, things got more and more weird. Unfortunately, not weird enough for my jaded self. Once she actually discovers the truth about her dad, and where he is, and how to get him back home? That part is a bit fucked up.

I also thought the acting was really well done. I just don’t think enough happened in the story for me. Part of the ending seemed like a bit of a cop out for me as well, problems got solved in a…rather easy way for my liking.

It was a pretty fine movie, just not my favorite. One I probably don’t have to see again anytime soon either.